You matter! You deserve to be happy!

Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you ~ Lao Tzu

You matter!  I’m not sure there is any more significant set of two words related to your personal happiness, with the possible exception of thank you.  We’ve talked about how important it is to be grateful here before, but today I want to talk about understanding that you matter.

The inspiration for today’s post came from a conversation I just had with a former student.  She’s kind of stuck, not sure what to do next and like a lot of us has let the pressure build up to the point where she’s stressed out, not sure what to do next  and starting to doubt herself.    She reached out to me because I’d given her some useful advice before, she reached out in hopes that I might make her feel a little better about what she needs to do.  In a lot of ways, I think all she really needed to hear was that in fact, she was smart and strong, and that she can do what she wants and needs to do to achieve her goals, that she matters.

And of course she does matter and she’s done impressive things in her life.  She’s an immigrant, she’s become educated, runs a small business is raising four children, big things.  However she’s in her early 30’s and our society and her culture tell women enough, you’re in your 30’s, you have children it’s time to raise them and stop thinking of yourself.  This of course is wrong, your children feed off your energy and learn from what you do!  If you work hard and strive for a better life, sacrifice to become more educated then they realize that is important as well.  If you work to be a happier person, they will realize that happiness is important as well.

You matter and your happiness matters and whether you attain it by striving for some goal or whether you gain it as Lao Tzu suggests by becoming content with where you are or what you already have, it matters and you matter.  It’s funny sometimes a simple idea or phrase can have so much power.  Simply telling someone as David Best does at Burning Man, that it’s not your fault, or telling someone that they matter can have a profound impact.  Take it to heart my friends, you matter and you deserve to be happy.

The funny thing about helping others, is that it is almost never a one-way process.  My former student called today to get help from me, to have me help her feel better about her life.  I believe I was able to do that to a degree, but in the process, she did at least as much for me.  She was able to show me that the advice I gave her in the past had been good, had helped her and most of all that advice had a lasting impact, the advice mattered and she provided a nice reminder that I do as well.

So remember, you matter, you deserve to be happy and you can start by having a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

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