Happiness & Standing Up for Yourself

We all know the concept, the old biblical saying, Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also; and whoever takes away your coat, do not withhold your shirt from him either. I’ve always really struggled with this concept. On one hand I would like to be the type of person who could instantly forgive people who have done me harm or even something Drew Carey has talked about, forgiving people in advance. However as someone who’s a teacher by training I wonder how people learn if there are no consequences to their actions?  A lot of times I feel more like this quote from Margret Cho.

People are naturally afraid of conflict and have been taught to turn the other cheek. Unfortunately far too many people take advantage of this and push the rest of us around. They drive like jerks, cut into lines and generally treat the world like they are the only ones in it. So should we turn the other cheek, or should we stand up for ourselves?

As I said above, I really struggle with this; there are times when I am able to let things go, in the end does it really matter that someone cut you off in traffic? Really, in the scheme of things it’s a moment, a truly irrelevant moment in your life. But if you react and get angry then it stays with you, bounces around in your mind. However, if someone is driving like an idiot and there is no price to pay, then what have they learned? And if they haven’t learned that it’s a problem, what incentive do they have to stop what they are doing?  Doesn’t this just lead to this?

Where I’ve come down on this issue is as follows; where there is truly no opportunity for anyone to learn anything, let it go. If the person you’re dealing with truly looks like they might be violent, let it go, very little is worth actual violence. However when it comes down to it you don’t want to become a doormat and destroy your own happiness. So when there is an opportunity for someone to learn or when your own person or self-worth is at stake, stand up for yourself. In the end I think you’ll feel better about yourself and be a happier person. Just my two cents tonight, have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane