Happiness & The Need to Win

Happiness & The Need to Win

sheenStrength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. When you go through hardships and decide not to surrender, that is strength. ~ Arnold Schwarzenegger

In the United States, part of the script we are fed from birth is how important winning is, to be American we are told is to never be bested.  It leads to a concept called American Exceptionalism which is a blind belief that whatever America does is best?  This of course is ridiculous, no person, no ideology, no country is always best or right, all are human creations and to my knowledge there has never been a perfect human.

We are fed on quotes like, “Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing – Vince Lombardi” or “Winning is the most important thing in my life, after breathing.  Breathing first, winning second ~ George Steinbrenner.”  Of course, Donald Trump has said, “My whole life is about winning.  I don’t lose often.  I almost never lose.”  Now I used these quotes in a particular order.  Lombardi was a great coach and he was talking about football.  Steinbrenner was the owner of the Yankees and not known as the most ethical of owners, who symbolized buying his way to championships.  Few people would hold up Donald Trump as a model of ethics, integrity or happiness.  Finally the image I use tonight, Charlie Sheen and his insistence in the middle of a drug and alcohol fueled meltdown that he was “winning!”  He has recently been diagnosed HIV positive and I feel for him but I don’t think I’d consider that winning.

Now this idea of winning has consequences in our everyday life that assault our happiness.  People come to believe that winning at all costs is the most important thing.  It shows up in the person who steals a parking spot you are quite obviously waiting on.  Drivers who tailgate and whip through traffic risking injury to all of us, even in the way whenever you pass someone on the highway they suddenly speed up as you go by.  This attitude leads to behaviors that create stress for all of us.  This focus on winning teaches us to be less empathetic and compassionate to our fellow humans.

Lack of empathy and compassion toward others has consequences for the self.  We get back what we give, when we are empathetic and compassionate, those are the type of emotions and actions that come back to us.  Is winning so important?  I’m all in favor of keeping score at kids games and in life, in fact we will win and lose and we need to know how to deal with that, but we also need perspective.  Do you have to win at getting a parking spot, a spot in line at the grocery store, is it really losing getting passed on the highway?  We need to keep perspective on what’s really important in life.  To me, being happy is what I consider winning, whether I’m first or fourth or last.  So my friends, slow down, take it easy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Our Best Happiness Posts for 2015

Revisiting Some of Our Best Posts & Pictures

There are Angels Among Us: A True Story of Giving & Kindness

Remember the Sweet Things

Happiness is Not Safety

Posted in personal happiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Happy News – April 4, 2016

Happy NewsApril 4, 2016

happiness newsOur weekly tour around the web to find positive and uplifting news, have a happy day my friends  ~ Rev Kane

 

01Quick Thinking Kids Find Creative Way to Help Cops

 

02Starbucks to Donate Unused Food to the Needy

 

03Little Girl’s Books Lost in Fire Replaced by Authors

 

04Homeless Couple Gets Dream Wedding from Community

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happy News – March 28, 2016

Happy News – March 21, 2016

Happy News – March 14, 2016

Happiness & Diastasis Recti

Happiness and Becoming Who You Are

 

Posted in personal happiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Introducing RevKane.com

Introducing RevKane.com

rev kane

Rev Kane relaxing in the arctic snow flurries

So I’ve taken the next step with the Ministry of Happiness and we’ve got our own domain.  I would have loved to have Ministry of Happiness dot com or org but those were not available.  So, I’ve settled on RevKane.com which was available.  You can still use our old domain Ministryofhappiness.wordpress.com, either address will work and bring you to the same place, you can still find us on Twitter @ministryofhappy

Some other planned changes will be coming as well, I’ll be consolidating some the pages on the blog and adding some new ones including pages with my photographs, poetry and my travel journals.  One thing I’m really happy about is that when I upgraded the blog I was also able to set it up so that ads will no longer appear on the post, that’s right for now on we’re ad free here at the Ministry of Happiness, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Posted in Random Happiness | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Happy News – March 28, 2016

Happy NewsMarch 28, 2016

happiness newsOur weekly tour around the web to bring you positive news, have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

 

01Officer pretends to be out for a walk to walk woman with dementia home

 

02

Firefighter pays $1000 electric bill to keep child on ventilator

 

03Brazilian ballet for the blind (video)

 

04Motherhood Helped Me Let Go of Perfection

 

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happy News – March 21, 2016

Happy News – March 14, 2016

Happy News – March 7, 2016

Happiness and Becoming Who You Are

Happiness & Diastasis Recti

Posted in happiness news | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Happiness & Diastasis Recti

Happiness & Diastasis Recti

diastasis2So tonight’s post is a little bit different from my normal posts.  Tonight I want to talk about a medical condition I’ve just discovered that I have, it’s called Diastasis Recti.  Here’s a little definition and description.

Diastasis Recti

Diastasis is a common source of concern and confusion for both patients and doctors. Diastasis refers to a stretching of the connective tissue that normally holds each side of your “six pack” muscles together. This band of tissue called the Linea alba (white line) is generally relatively thin and firm. The white line may be weak in some individuals as a normal anatomical variant or, more commonly, it can be stretched out after large fluctuations in weight gain and loss, such as pregnancy.

Diastasis affects both men and women. Most commonly, a patient will notice an “Alien” coming from the abdomen between the rib cage and the belly button when they try to do a sit up. The area is rarely painful and almost is never seen except when doing “sit up” type movements. (From Michigan Hernia Surgery)

For me I noticed mine a couple of years ago, it was smaller and it made no sense to me as anatomically I knew that there wasn’t anything that should cause this bump.  I wish I had Googled it back then but I saw a really fit guy at the gym with one and just assumed it was normal.  A couple of weeks ago, I was doing some crunches and looked down to see that my bump had grown and that scared me.  So I Googled it and bam, Diastasis Recti (DR).  I had unfortunately made it worse over the last few months because I had been doing a lot of crunches and similar abdominal workouts.  I thought I was doing something good, and to a degree I was, but there are better ways to build your core strength that won’t aggravate or create this condition.

Of course the core reason for this condition is that I’ve been overweight for most of my life and I carry my weight around my belly which causes pressure on the linea alba much like when a woman is pregnant.  This condition is most often seen in post partum women who in an effort to get their pre-baby bodies back do tons of crunches and cause a weakening in the linea alba.  I have joked for years about my belly that I was pregnant, it seems the universe has a sense of humor.

Once I realized what was going on I set out to do some research and it was enlightening.  It was enlightening in two ways, first in what I was learning about the condition and secondly how much bad information is out there on the internet.  So, my disclaimer, I’m not a medical professional, you should check with yours before doing anything.  One of the first things I saw was that DR could not be fixed with exercise and had to be surgically repaired.  From my further research I don’t believe this to be true and have confirmed that with a couple of physical therapists.  Now, it may have to be surgically repaired if there is a hernia involved as well, or if after going through the appropriate physical therapy you are unable to re-strengthen the tissue and reduce the size of the bump.

What I have primarily learned is two things, in the beginning, abdominal binding may be a good idea but is not absolutely necessary.  Second, the real goal here is to increase your transverse abdominal muscles without doing exercises that stress the condition (i.e. crunches, traditional sit-ups or straight leg lifts).  This means working with some yoga and Pilates related exercises as well as doing abdominal bracing and hollowing exercises.  Almost everything I read said it would likely take up to six weeks to start to see results and up to twelve weeks to normally resolve the condition.  That of course means you’re doing the exercises religiously and not doing anything to cause a set back.  At the bottom of the piece I’ll list some sites that I found helpful both for exercises and information, but as always buyer beware.

So the title of the piece is Happiness & Diastasis Recti, how the heck could this make me happy?  It’s a lesson in our day-to-day happiness that I dare say I might not have come to several years ago.  In every situation there is an opportunity, they are not always obvious, but they are almost always there.  Happiness is also a choice, I strongly believe that and in this situation I’ve made the choice to look for the opportunity and be happy about it.  I will be for the next six weeks effectively be wearing a girdle and that will make me self-conscious as hell.  I can no longer do crunches or work the captain’s chair doing straight leg lifts, something that I was pretty proud of building up to.

However, this situation has provided me with a few things.  First, it is more motivation to lose weight, I’ve dropped down to within about twenty pounds of my goal weight, I’m almost fifty pounds lighter than I was at my heaviest and this has given me the extra motivation to lose those last pounds.  Secondly, I’m more in touch with my core, to say that in the most new age, hippie way I can think to say it.  However this is really a good thing, it’s got me exercising differently as well as changing some basic movements like the way I get out of bed.  This new core awareness should actually help me become a stronger better cyclist and hiker and that’s a good thing.

We all face struggles and new hurdles pop up all of the time, we can choose to be victims, we can choose to be upset, or we can choose to look for opportunities and make the best of things.  When we choose to look for those our opportunities we are choosing happiness, so choose happiness and have many happy days my friends ~ Rev Kane

Helpful Sites I’ve Found

DR beginning exercises for deep abdominal muscles – I really like this lady’s demeanor and it’s a great beginning point for exercises and workouts.  There are more advanced exercises on her home site.

12 Weeks of Workouts to Rebuild After DR – this site has a good section on how to determine if you have this as well as some good exercises for building your transverse abdominal (TVA) muscles.

Your guide to treating DR – Part 1

Your guide to treating DR – Part 2 – I really like these two videos, the trainer brings in a Physical Therapist to talk about the exercises and the condition and there’s a good little question and answer section.

The MuTu system, for Mummy Tummy – this system gets really good press around the net and seems to work, it’s essentially pre-packaged TVA and other exercises with an online coach for about $100.  So the first page is good info, but not everything as they want you to buy the rest.

 

Posted in personal happiness | Tagged , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Mardi Gras 2016: A little Bit of Everything, Part 2

Mardi Gras 2016: A little Bit of Everything, Part 2

IMGP9841Another batch of my Mardi Gras 2016 photos, enjoy, have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

IMGP9857 IMGP9858 IMGP9859 IMGP9863 IMGP9865 IMGP9871IMGP9875 IMGP9889 IMGP9893 IMGP9895 IMGP9896 IMGP9899 IMGP9909IMGP9912 IMGP9916 IMGP9918 IMGP9919 IMGP9938 IMGP9942IMGP9943 IMGP9951 IMGP9958 IMGP9963 IMGP9966 IMGP9972 IMGP9973 IMGP9978 IMGP9979

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Mardi Gras 2016: Street Musicians & Bead Tosses

NOLA: Krewe of the Bossom Buddies

Mardi Gras in Mobile

NOLA is Mardi Gras

Fantasy Fest

Posted in personal happiness | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Mardi Gras 2016 – Street People, Part 2

Mardi Gras 2016Street People, Part 2

IMGP0103Some more photos tonight from my time in the French Quarter at Mardi Gras, 2016, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

fix 33 fix 40 fix 55 fix 57 IMGP0106 IMGP0107IMGP0108 IMGP0110 IMGP0114 IMGP0117 IMGP0120 IMGP0121IMGP0122 IMGP0123 IMGP0126 IMGP0127 IMGP0134 IMGP0137

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Mardi Gras 2016: Street Musicians & Bead Tosses

NOLA: Krewe of the Bossom Buddies

Mardi Gras in Mobile

NOLA is Mardi Gras

Fantasy Fest

Posted in Happiness is Photography | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Mardi Gras 2016: A Little Bit of Everything

Mardi Gras 2016: A Little Bit of Everything

beignetsAnother set of shots from Mardi Gras 2016, have a happy day my friends       ~ Rev Kane

carnival oncarnival on 2

 

 

 

 

 

 

IMGP0013 IMGP0043 IMGP0044 IMGP0046 IMGP0180

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IMGP0008 IMGP9842 IMGP9843 IMGP9844 IMGP9845 IMGP9847 IMGP9848

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

IMGP9851 IMGP9852 IMGP9853 IMGP9854 IMGP9855

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Mardi Gras 2016: Street Musicians & Bead Tosses

NOLA: Krewe of the Bossom Buddies

Mardi Gras in Mobile

NOLA is Mardi Gras

Mardi Gras 2016: Street People, Part 1

Posted in Happiness is Photography | Tagged , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Happy News – March 21, 2016

Happy NewsMarch 21, 2016

happiness newsOur weekly tour to bring you some positive and happy news, have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

01The Kentucky State House has just approved a fee community college plan

 

02People are Hard Wired to be Kind and Generous

03Why Smiling is Good for You

Woman in meadow at sunset

30 Powerful Truths that Will Change Your Life

Other Positive News Posts!

Happy News – March 14, 2016

Happy News – March 7, 2016

Happy News – February 29, 2016

Happy News – February 22, 2016

Happy News – February 15, 2016

Happy News – February 1, 2016

Posted in happiness news | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Mardi Gras 2016: Street People, Part 1

Mardi Gras 2016: Street People, Part 1

fix elvis balconyTonight the first batch of shots of street folks from Mardi Gras 2016 in New Orleans.  Mostly daytime shots from the French Quarter, enjoy ~ Rev Kane

A shot I really like, a street poet set up near St. Louis Cathedral on Chartres.

fix poet 1 fix poet 1afix balcony ladies fix crawfish fix kids fix peep 1 fix people on phones fix pink ladies fix street lady fix street man big balls fix street sister fix suit

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Mardi Gras 2016: Street Musicians & Bead Tosses

NOLA: Krewe of the Bossom Buddies

Mardi Gras in Mobile

NOLA is Mardi Gras

Fantasy Fest

Posted in Happiness is Photography | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments