Depression begins with disappointment. When disappointment festers in our soul, it leads to discouragement. ~ Joyce Meyer

It’s been a pretty bad couple of weeks for me. There have been some family health issues as well as some interpersonal issues and work has been more of an insane asylum than it usually is. It’s one of the reasons I missed posting last week, something I rarely do. This blog has gone through a lot of changes over the years and over time has really morphed into something of a public diary. A blog that mirrors my life and my interests as diverse and nutty as they are. So some weeks you get a lesson on happiness, sometimes a pizza or movie review, travel anecdotes or maybe just a bit of rambling. I usually try and bring most of the posts back to a lesson on happiness, and I do that with varying amounts of success. I greatly appreciate those of you who read the blog regularly and love when you comment, it’s what has kept this blog alive for the last dozen years.

One of the main reasons that I started this blog was to share what I learned as I worked through my own issues with severe depression. As I’ve related many times, I expected to share out for a year or so and wrap this up, so much for the plans of men. This last week was a great reminder of the progress I’ve made over that time, aided by what I learned, the writing of this blog and your support.

I quite honestly, at the beginning of this past week, was in the foulest mood I’d been in for years. Where I’ve been very good over the last ten years of not letting issues in life impact my mood, I failed miserably recently. The anger and frustration I was feeling set me on a path to dive back into the well of depression in a way I haven’t in over a decade. 

Over the years I’ve done a good job of understanding my triggers, the things that send my mood diving. I obviously missed them this time around. I’ve also over the years learned how to bring myself out of these moods, but normally it’s not so big of a climb. And this is the good news and what I want to focus on in this post, because I was able by this weekend to climb back out of that well and get myself back to balance.

Over time I’ve learned a lot of strategies to bring myself back to balance and I needed all of them this past week. First, it’s always important to be living healthy, eating properly, drinking enough water, keeping my workout routine and get enough sleep. Then it was important to boost my dopamine and serotonin levels. Which at the simplest levels, without diving into the brain chemistry details, means providing yourself with feel good experiences. So this week, I actually got a little looser with my diet. I didn’t go nuts but I made sure that every meal was something satisfying. So while ordinarily tacos would be a cheat meal, I made tacos for dinner one night. Another day for lunch I allowed myself some enchiladas, I had a slice of pizza another day. I also did everything I could to find ways to reduce my stress levels, which also included cutting back on my social media and news consumption. 

All of these things were definitely helping and as often happens, when you make an effort things seem to start to go your way. As the week went on I had some really nice interactions with kind strangers, I was able to help out some students and made more of a conscious effort to express gratitude internally and externally for what was happening. Then on Thursday night as I sat down to eat those tacos, I flipped on the TV to find something to watch. And starting at that exact time, on TCM (so no commercials) was the movie that makes me laugh more than any other movie, The Big Lebowski. So that night I ate dinner and laughed and laughed as I watched that movie. Friday and Saturday were laid back days and I even had a couple of great conversations with people who make me smile, including my two nieces. 

I feel really good about this, honestly I was scared that I was going to go into a serious depression. To have pulled myself out of the spiral in a week seems honestly like a minor miracle to me. One I’m incredibly grateful for, and now, next week, back to our regularly scheduled discussions about happiness. Have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane