When I think of summertime as a kid, I think of my Grampy’s gardens full of tomatoes, buckets heaping with blackberries, and countertops lined with an assortment of Ball jars, ready to can the flavor of summer. ~ Damaris Phillips

Happiness: First Tomato of 2026

I have a tradition, taken from my grandfather, Grandpa Kane as we called him. He’s the main influence in my life in terms of my love gardening. He also taught me to grow roses by brilliantly tricking a little six year-old guy by explaining the first step was to go fishing and I loved to fish. We would catch bluegills and then put them in the hole where we planted the rose bushes to serve as fertilizer.

The tradition is a simple one, the first tomato of the year is to be celebrated and to quote him, “eaten like an apple with salt and a bottle of beer.” I rarely drink but tradition is tradition so I’ll be buying a bottle of beer tonight to enjoy my first tomato.

This was Grandpa Kane in front of some of his flowers, he also did the gardening at the convent where my aunt is a nun and the nuns knew him well. He was a fascinating old dude, WWII veteran, landed on D-Day in France, a few weeks later became a POW in a German camp, escaped, re-captured and lived til 90. When he died I did his funeral and a couple of years before, yes, in his 80s, he got into a street fight. It was that story that I told as his eulogy and has become the favorite poem I’ve ever written, enjoy and have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

A Eulogy to amuse the penguins                     2006

People don’t want the truth
particularly not when death is at hand
they don’t want to know a life
can’t stand to see the warts
they want disneyanna
where at the end of the day we gather
and have a parade down main street America

My grandfather was a man
a hard man
a cold man
but he mellowed with age
hard jagged lines on his face
fading soft with his laughter
eyes lit as he talked about back in the day

He died in 2000 and I was asked to do the eulogy
wanting to speak his life warts and all
but my sister ratted me out
ratted me out to my aunt the nun
I suffered through the speeches
sister, aunt, father oh my
to my shame I acquiesced

But I was on the hook my friends
had to stand up in front
relatives, family, friends, nuns
So I chose to pick a slice
grab a day in the life
and this is the one I chose

My grandfather loved tomatoes and roses
and in the neighborhood was a challenged boy
a boy of 32 with a dad in his 50’s
the boy had trampled grandpa’s plants and he was pissed
he had the opportunity to see the boy’s father
never given to silence, he spoke
of course grandpa spoke with his fists
like an 87 yr old warrior from the WWF
he came off the top step with a right cross
Grandpa went to scrappin in the street
he lost, hitting his head on the curb

I found my way to the hospital the next day
and asked him what happened
he said that guy had a roll of nickels in his hand
yeah grandpa, he was waitin for you
then he grew stone faced and paused
looking at me seriously, he said
I hit that guy in the gut with everything I had
and he didn’t go down, I might be getting old
and I laughed at the coolest thing I’ve ever heard
that day,
my 87 year old grandfather
just started to consider that he might be getting old.

People in the church smiled,
but the penguins rolled in the aisles,
because they knew him best