Do nothing, do nothing, let it happen, don’t try. ~ Dean Stanton

A Happy Do Nothing Day

One of the things I often re-realize when I travel to other countries, is that the biggest difference between living in America, and living in other countries, is that in American culture we are trained, hell driven, to always be productive. Maybe it’s a remnant of the frontier attitude, maybe it’s an ill of Capitalism, maybe it’s just a habit we’ve gotten into over generations. Whatever the reason, it often makes us feel that if we’re not being productive, if we’re not doing something, going somewhere, participating in something, we’re doing something wrong.

In other countries the pace is so different. While I noticed it in some other places first, the place I really learned this was in Brazil. In Brazil you’ll talk to someone and decide to get together for a meeting or just socially and often the answer to when, is after dinner. The first time I was told this, I went to the place we were supposed to meet to have dinner, I didn’t want to miss them if I was gauging dinner later than I should. I arrived at six and got a table, I ate a leisurely dinner for about an hour, had some dessert a drink and relaxed, and waited for them to arrive. Seven turned to eight, to nine to ten and finally around ten thirty they came bouncing in. Good evening, I’m glad you’re here already. It became quickly apparent that they felt they were right on time, maybe even a little early. After some conversation I asked about what time Brazilians meant when they said, after dinner. They explained, it is now, or later, it’s when we arrive. Dinner can also be six or eight or even ten at night. It’s not a problem, no one is in a hurry, things will happen when they happen.

I’ve seen this again and again everywhere, except in America. When I was living in Spain for a month, businesses opened later, closed for a couple of hours at lunch and it was not unusual at all to see restaurants packed as late as midnight, with kids playing in the street as their parents finished dinner. It was the same in Portugal, I’ve never been but I know that it is much the same way in France and Italy. In Morocco I came to believe there was no set time for anything, and everyone was fine with it.

There is something really nice about leisurely sitting for lunch, taking your time, talking and just sitting and watching the world go by. I once went for a cup of tea in Morocco and it lasted for two hours as I sat and watched all the things that went down in the square outside the tea house. And not once, not at all did I feel rushed, never did a waiter come by and check on me with the intention of moving me on. It’s easy to feel the stress melt away in those times.

I’ve been running pretty hard for a few months between finalizing my mom’s estate, filing for social security, filing for my California retirement, getting a new job and then of course moving 3000+ miles across the country and starting a new job. Normally I take a couple of weeks off between jobs but it wasn’t in the cards this time, so I drove across the country and a day and a half later started work.

Being back in real winter for the first time in almost thirty years meant this weekend I got to gear up for my first snow storm in a very long time. I was reminded of something about Winter in the Northeast, sometimes the storm doesn’t come. So Thursday night was supposed to be snow, we got nothing. But the forecast seemed to zero in on today being a day of snow showers all day with a possible couple of inch accumulation and a cold day.

So I made the decision yesterday, today would be a do nothing day. So I slept in and I talked to my cousin, the Smoochy Monster, on the phone. I did some cooking, I went through my winter clothes bag and got all that stuff organized. I played some games on my phone, watched some football and now, am banging out this little post.

The hardest part of a day like this is getting past that desire to do something, accomplish things. The fact is, it’s ok sometimes to just be, it’s good for your soul, your mental health and it’s a way to have a happy day my friends, I hope you can find a way to have one soon. ~ Rev Kane