My Odd New Life

My Odd New Life

1Happiness is not something ready made, it comes from your actions ~ Dalai Lama

So I’m at the end of my first full week inside of my temporary new life here in Florida.  I’ve figured out all of the necessities, where to work out, to buy groceries, do laundry.  I’ve quickly become a fixture at the public library where I’m writing this piece, it’s quite a nice library and a good place to work and read.

I’m settling into a routine, unfortunately I’m having to force myself into being more of a morning person than I really want to be.  Unfortunately, it makes too much sense not to be, now I just need to convince myself to go to sleep at a more reasonable hour.  Between working out pretty hard and diminishing sleep I’m getting a bit tired, but that will change.

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A little Arctic sunset shot and a tease for my photos for my upcoming posts on my Polar Bear trip

The big upside of course is I’m writing, at the moment quickly catching up on blog responsibilities, getting ahead on my daily posts and prepping for my annual anti-holiday depression posts.  I’m nibbling at the books I’m here to write, hopefully I’ll dig more deeply in next week now that I have a bit of a routine.  I have a few goals for myself while I’m here, I’m hoping to drop 15 – 20 pounds and add some muscle back to my upper body.  I’ve got 4 books to get done and a fifth to outline so I’m going to be pretty busy.  I also want to get this blog back to daily posts and more consistency.

Of course, this existence of pretty much nothing but gym time and writing also allows me a lot of time to think, that’s good and bad of course.  It allows for lots of introspection and planning, but it also leads to time to dwell on the negative.  Of course, the upside of dwelling on the negative is that is when I’m most productive on the poetry front so I’ve been writing a bit on that side.  Here’s a sample and remember, this is how I burn off negative energy.

My Island                                                       11/11/15

It’s that moment
where you want to scream
throw punches
kick at the walls
punch holes
in reality itself

Followed
by the sinking feeling
that it will make no difference
change nothing
but the alignment
the structure
of the bones
in your hand

Weeping
never really worked for me
but the tears will run
like condensation
on the tent flap
on a colder than you want morning

I’m broken, damaged
but I maintain
not just moving forward
but the very mask
that is necessary to protect you all
from the monster below

I’ve been called
an emotionless robot
the surface theater
more necessary
than any realize
I’ve always been
a great liar
a great actor
the difference
eludes me

The surface calm
necessity
for what lies below
dangerous chaos
an active minefield
unnavigable
by the average human
I’ve watched those who’ve tried
torn to shreds
their souls twisted
into unrecognizable piles

So I sit
the very center
of the deadly storm
unable
perhaps unwilling
to calm the winds
or map the mines
the island
my safety
my sanctuary
my unbelievably lonely safe space

So a new journey is underway, one that will hopefully be productive.  I’ve also planned a little getaway for Thanksgiving and a farewell to this life by celebrating Mardis Gras in Mobile, AL  Things are certainly less adventurous than they’ve been in a while but looking forward to a whole set of challenges and of course, happy days.  ~ Rev Kane

 

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Happiness, Cynicism & Paris

Happiness, Cynicism & Paris

1It is better to sit alone than in company with the bad; and it is, better still to sit with the good than alone. It is better to speak to a seeker of knowledge than to remain silent; but silence is better than idle words. ~ Mohammed

It’s very easy in our world to become cynical, I speak from experience.  I’ve always been a very cynical person, it comes from living in a world where people let you down, with consistency.  A world where our politicians will say anything to get elected, where elected officials are more concerned with opposing the other political party than actually governing or trying to help people.   I see on TV every day advertisements from coal and oil companies talking about how much they love the environment, pretending that we can burn petroleum free of consequences.  We are bombarded on a daily basis from a hundred directions manipulated by expert advertisers whose job it is to tell us what we like, what we care about, who to vote for, what we should look like and even who the good guys and bad guys are in the world.   It makes you wonder at times if any of your thoughts are your own.

Last night in Paris, terrorists attacked and slaughtered over one hundred people.  In our current world this happens all too frequently, the 1995 Tokyo Subway attacks, 9/11 in the United States, the 2008 attacks in Mumbai and decades of attacks between Israelis and Palestinians.  It would be easy and seemingly rational to become cynical about mankind and our world.  We could decide to hate Muslims, immigrants or anyone who could possibly be labeled them, instead of US.  Individual men will always be capable of making heinous choices, violence will occur, you could get run over by a bus tomorrow or hit in the head with a piece of space debris.  As I was told before I began hiking the Appalachian Trail this Summer, I could be attacked by bears or villainous men on the trail. I could be bitten by rattlesnakes, struck by lightning, killed by a falling tree, get infected with the West Nile virus or Lyme Disease.  All of these things likely happened to someone hiking the trail, but I went anyway.  You can choose to live in fear and anger, but is this living?

fearIt is a quick and easy path to cynicism for those of us who think and feel.  However, as I’ve gotten older I’ve begun to see a dark futility in being so cynical.  That time-frame of that realization, not so surprisingly, fairly closely corresponds with the birth of the Ministry of Happiness.  In creating a happier life for myself, it seemed appropriate, maybe even necessary to share and help others; perhaps altruism, maybe it was just about having some company on the path.  Through this journey some of the cynical edge to my view has begun to dissipate and it has helped me progress toward a happier life.  Part of what has helped me accomplish that is to work to give up the fear and the anger I possessed, fear is a liar, anger leads to regret. It’s not easy to let these emotions go, but you have one life as far as I know and I want you to be as happy as you can be, I want to be as happy as I can be.  So my suggestion to you is to work to replace fear and anger, with gratitude and kindness.

1The irony is not lost on me that the attacks in Paris occurred on World Kindness Day.  The cynic in me wants to suggest terror is winning out over kindness, but I don’t think it is and that’s something I learned on the Appalachian Trail, people (strangers) can be incredibly kind and giving and I’m grateful for that and the opportunity to be the same.

At the head of this piece I purposefully used a quote from Mohamed juxtaposed with the Eiffel Tower peace symbol, we can mourn for the dead, we can have sympathy for the wounded and the families left behind in Paris and we can also understand that Islam, like all religions, on paper is a peaceful religion.  However, individual men can do horrible things in the name of peaceful religions.  Think the Buddhist attacks on Muslims in Burma, the Crusades, or Northern Ireland, few religions are immune from violence carried out in it its name.  The cynic says damn all religions, but in addition to the bad, so much good has been done in the name of religion, think Mother Teresa, the Dalai Lama, Ghandi or Martin Luther King.

1So the choice I’ve decided to make, and one I hope you’ll make, is to let go of the cynicism.  Instead of throwing up hateful words online, or blaming anyone but the actors for what happened, take that energy and be kind to someone.  Be grateful for what you have and for the good that exists in the world, you’ll be happier for it.   Hopefully some of what we do here will help you as well, and as always, have a happy day my friends  ~ Rev Kane.

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Happy World Kindness Day!

Happy World Kindness Day!

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A warm smile is the universal language of kindness. ~ William Arthur Ward

Happy World Kindness Day! I used the quote above for a specific reason, we often see things like World Kindness Day and think, great another day where I’m supposed to go out and do something and I just don’t have time.  Let me, let you, off the hook a bit.  Reread the quote at the top, all you need to do today to be a bit kinder is just remember to smile.  Easy enough but a simple smile can be an amazing thing.

1So in honor of World Kindness Day here are some of my previous posts about kindness, enjoy and have a kind and happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Random Acts of Kindness & Happiness

There are Angels Among Us: A True Story of Kindness & Giving

Random Happiness: Stories of Kindness

Videos: Inspiration, Kindness & Gratitude

The Dalai Lama on Kindness & Compassion

Quotes about Happiness, Gratitude & Kindness

Happiness & Human Kindness

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Fun Friday: The Onion & The Oatmeal

Fun Friday: The Onion & The Oatmeal

From The Oatmeal

From The Oatmeal

Laughter is the sun that drives winter from the human face. ~ Victor Hugo

Two of my favorite humor sites are the The Onion & The Oatmeal.  The Onion operates like a satirical newspaper and frankly the headlines are often far funnier than the posts, but they are timely and humorous and put a smile on my face.  The Oatmeal posts a wide variety of cartoons (comics) both worth a look and here are a few pieces below to raise a smile on your Friday and help you have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

From the Oatmeal

1When your house is burning down you should brush your teeth

1The terrible & wonderful reasons I started running long distances

1Why the Mantis Shrimp is my new favorite animal

1I used to suffer from F.O.M.O. (Fear Of Missing Out)

 

From The Onion

1Relationship Experts Recommend Single Women Try Bathing In Open Stream Until Suitor Glimpses Them Through Trees

 

1Nation Figured Everything Would Run On Some Kind Of Cubes Of Blue Energy By Now

 

1Everyone In Family Compliments Grandmother On How Small And Feeble She’s Gotten

 

1Scientists Find Strong Link Between Male Virility, Wearing Mötley Crüe Denim Jacket

 

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Happy News: November 10, 2015

Happy News: November 15, 2015

happiness newsTonight our weekly tour around the web to bring you the kind of positive news you can’t find in the normal news outlets, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

1Child saves another child with help from Sponge Bob!

2Meet a cow who thinks he’s a big dog

1Police officer leaps in to save mother and children!

1Home Depot has remodeled 22,000 Vets Homes

mood happiness

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Happiness & A New Home

Happiness & A New Home

1So as I’ve mentioned before I am taking a few months to work on a book about my Appalachian Trail experience this Summer.  So in order to accomplish this I needed a place to hang out and write.  I had a few criteria: first, that it would be warm during the winter; second, that it was near the ocean; and third, that it would be interesting but not too interesting as I do want to get the book done. This third criteria ruled out my first choice, New Orleans, I was afraid that I’d get too distracted in my favorite city.

When I mentioned these criteria on the trail this Summer, one of my hiking partners, Second Star had suggested Pensacola, Florida.  I’m happy to say that it was a great suggestion and that I have indeed landed a new temporary home in Pensacola.  The town fits my criteria and I’ve found a small place as my base of operations.

2A new town, where you know almost no one is a bit daunting.  You consider things like your car breaking down, or being in the hospital and having no one who can come to your aid or help you out.  You get lost a bit, I’ve been lost three times in my first few days here.  You get lonely, even though, as the loner I am, back in California I would have likely spent this same time alone.  One of the things that concerns me a bit is the possibility of falling back into the well and getting a bit depressed.  However after today I’m much less concerned about that.

3Pensacola is a fun town, I’ve found all of the essentials and it seems every weekend there is a festival in town.  Today, there was a huge art festival and next week an Italian festival.  I’m looking forward to my first trip to the national seashore and a road trip to Mobile, AL.  I met some cool local people today and I do have an old mentor in town who I’ll connect with soon and a high school friend not too far down the road.

Even more so today, after an afternoon nap, the writing juices starting flowing.  I really was in a mood to write this afternoon and this and another post were the result.  So I will be taking all of my own advice from this blog and will be working on being positive and moving forward, accepting my new changes.  My writing will be my focus for the next three months, hopefully a productive three months and lots of happy days my friends ~ Rev Kane

 

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Happiness is Fantasy Fest

Happiness is Fantasy Fest

The theme this year was intergalactic freak

The theme this year was intergalactic freak

For those who are not aware, Fantasy Fest is the annual Halloween Celebration in Key West, FL.  In reality it is half Halloween celebration, half Mardis Gras.  It’s a very accepting and permissive place and festival and the costumes can be a bit interesting.  On that front if you are easily offended by nudity, sexuality or frightening images you might want to skip the rest of this post.

I first attended Fantasy Fest about 10 years ago, it was a blast.  This year I was invited back to celebrate my friend’s 50th birthday in Key West which included Fantasy Fest.

I love Key West, a lovely tropical island, hot, muggy, beautiful water and a very relaxed pace makes it a great place to relax and enjoy life.  Fantasy Fest makes things a bit more interesting but sadly the festival seems to be moving further away from the arts and more towards a Bourbon Street atmosphere.  It does however  lead to some fabulous photos.

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Happiness & Food: Buffalo Wings

Happiness & Food: Buffalo Wings

A plate of medium wings at The Anchor Bar.

A plate of medium wings at The Anchor Bar.

I don’t mind hot and spicy. Actually find that appealing in a girl. And chicken wings ~ Julie James

So recently I noticed a two-part article in USA Today about Buffalo Chicken Wings, their origin and then a ranking of the best wings in Buffalo (Part 1Part 2).  And in case Jessica Simpson is reading this, they are made out of chicken darlin, buffalo don’t have wings.  Given I was heading out to Canton, OH and then to Pittsburgh, I decided to make a stop into Buffalo for the night and hit the Anchor Bar (the origin place) and Duff’s (the place they said was best).

There are a couple of origin stories but the one thing everyone agrees on is that the Anchor Bar in Buffalo, NY absolutely made chicken wings famous.  I do find it amusing that Frank’s Red Hot sauce works its way into every story and for the record I do like the taste of it.

Anchor bar 2I visited the Anchor Bar last week, I hadn’t been there in 33 years.  You see I started my academic career in Rochester, about an hour east of Buffalo, and of course as a college student when wings were very popular, and being so close, we had to make the pilgrimage.  Returning 33 years later I was pleasantly surprised to find not a lot had changed at the Anchor Bar in that time.  Sure, it’s got a gift shop now and it’s a lot more well-known, but otherwise and the next photo will show you, things are still pretty much the same as they have been for a very long time.

Anchor bar 1Happily the other thing that hasn’t changed are the wings.  I got an order of medium wings and they were excellent, flavorful with a little bit of kick.  I really enjoyed the wings and my little trip down memory lane.

The second place I went to was the place USA Today said had the best wings in the city, Duff’s.

duffs 1Duffs 3Duff’s is a more modern chain restaurant with several locations around the city.  There were some interesting things I found immediately interesting, one was the chain restaurant feel.  The second was that apparently the hiring policy for waitresses was that they be young, fit and attractive.  I did a split order of mild and medium light as there are signs and notes on the menu that their wings are hot!  They were not lying even a little bit, unfortunately it seems the way they make mild is by putting a couple of dabs of sauce on the bottom of the dish.  The medium light were much better, good flavor and they carried a really nice kick.  I seriously cannot conceive of ordering their hot wings, or the pain involved in eating their top-level, atomic, I think they were called.  But if you are a spicy, hot food junky I think this would be the place to test yourself.  Luckily, there were plenty of options to wash down the spice.

duffs 4One last thing about Duff’s, I was in there at the bar during the Bills game.  Definitely a fun place to be when the Bills are winning and when they score they pour free shots, it was definitely a fun atmosphere.

I have to say I liked the wing at the Anchor Bar better, more flavor a nice kick but nothing overtly trying to test my manhood.  The wings at Duff’s were good, definitely a place worth eating at and especially if you like your wings HOT!

All in all it was a great little food pilgrimage and a very happy day my friends.                        ~ Rev Kane

 

 

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Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments – Part 3

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments – Part 3

The other night I posted the first part of this blog, Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments – Part 1

Last night I posted the second part, Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments – Part 2

1One day in the Shenandoah National Park the trail winds out into a park.  I was excited about getting there mostly because AWOL’s guide mentioned that the park had bathrooms with running water.  When you’re on the trail small luxuries can make you really happy and the prospect of being able to take a sink shower and get water I didn’t have to treat had me in a good mood.  As I emerged into the park I ran into two really cool section hikers I’d hung out with a bit at the shelter the night before, it didn’t hurt at all that they are both really pretty.

Two adorable section hikers I met in the Shenandoah

Two adorable section hikers I met in the Shenandoah

The girls were laying on the grass next to a picnic table and I asked to join them and I laid down on the bench of the picnic table.  It was one of those blue sky, puffy white cloud days where you can see patterns in the cloud and so I laid there and did just that.  The girls left and Second Star also came and went and I laid on that table for about an hour.  It was the most pleasurable hour I’ve spent in some time.  It hit me while laying there that it had been decades since I’d done this and I really wondered why?  This is the beauty of hiking the AT, you get time to stop and just enjoy nature, to just be.  When we were kids we understood the importance of this, as adults we get too busy, too distracted we have forgotten the beauty and importance of slowing down and just being.  This moment had a profound impact on me and since then I’ve been slowing down and taking more time to simply be, not enough, but I’m getting better at it.

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On the battlefield, the military pledges to leave no soldier behind. As a nation, let it be our pledge that when they return home, we leave no veteran behind. ~ Dan Lipinski

Me and Mao at a shelter in the SNP

Me and Mao at a shelter in the SNP

On the trail I met a hiker called Mao, (I never know if I’m spelling that correctly), and he was a great guy.  He’s a combat veteran and a Marine, we talked about my grandfathers and their service in World War II.  We also talked about the cause he was hiking for, to raise awareness about suicide among our veterans.  I wrote an earlier piece about this and how you can help our veterans.    Mao knew my knee was hurting me and a couple of days later he would end up coming out of camp behind me.  He’s a much faster hiker than I am but after he passed me on the trail I noticed he was pretty consistently about 100 yards ahead of me.  It hit me that he was hanging back and looking out for me.  I pushed to catch up to him and asked him what he was doing?  He simply said, “your hurt and hiking in the rain, I can’t leave a man behind.”  It was a simple act of kindness and magnificent example of how we look out for each other on the trail.  I thanked him and reminded him I was my grandfather’s son, my grandpa Kane got in a street fight when he was 87, he smiled and said ok and quickly moved off down the trail.  I would be luck enough to run into him again much later on the trail and I’m so happy to say he completed his thru-hike recently summiting Katahdin.
It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.                             ~ Frederick Douglass

One of the great things I got to do while slack packing in Massachusetts was to take my nephew out for a hike with me.  I miscalculated the mileage and it turned out to be about half as long as I had intended but it was great to be out there hiking with him.  He did great and the hike reminded me of the first time we ever did something alone together.  When he was about three years-old I accompanied him and his family to Walt Disney World in Florida.  At the end of the day he wanted to go swimming at the hotel and no one else was ready.  Being an impatient three year-old he already had his suit on and was ready to go.  So to avoid the drama I agreed to take him and quickly through on my suit.  It was a big moment, I’m not sure at that point he’d ever gone anywhere without his parents before.  He held my hand tightly as we walked down the hall and into the elevator.  As we approached the pool he kept looking back at the hotel.  We got to the pool and got his life jacket on and he balked, first wanting to wait, then asking incessantly and finally wanting to go back to the hotel.  Of course half way back the rest of the family arrived and we went back to the pool.  That day on the trail brought back that memory and made me smile.

My nephew at the Shay's Rebellion Monument

My nephew at the Shay’s Rebellion Monument

Getting fierce next to his first white blaze

Getting fierce next to his first white blaze

Rev Kane and his nephew on the AT in MA.

Rev Kane and his nephew on the AT in MA.

Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light.    ~ Helen Keller

The real test for my rehabbed knee was to go out on the trail again with a full pack.  My friend Bryan had also wanted to hike on the trail with me so I happily got to combine the two and we decided to do a week long hike from Bennington, VT down to Lee, MA.  The hike worked out well, my knee did fine.  There were two really precious things about the week.  We were heading southbound so we were passing thru-hikers I had started with and I got to see some old friends including the three hikers I rode in with to Amicalola State Park.

Reuniting in VT with hikers I met on the first day.

Reuniting in VT with hikers I met on the first day.

The boys arriving at Amicalola

The boys arriving at Amicalola

The other thing was the chance to spend a week with one of my best friends.  This was the kind of time we hadn’t had together since college almost thirty years ago.

Pausing in front of a pretty stream on our last day!

Pausing in front of a pretty stream on our last day!

Being out there with a close friend, introducing him to the trail was incredibly special and the type of thing that makes the trail so special.  It was an amazing week full of very happy days my friends ~ Rev Kane

RELATED ARTICLES YOU MIGHT ENJOY

Appalachian Trail Happiness: A Walk in the Woods

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments – Part 1

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Trail Community

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Quitting the Appalachian Trail

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Appalachian Trail Happiness: Post Trail Depression

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Post Trail Depression

First rough night on the AT
You and I will meet again, When we’re least expecting it, One day in some far off place, I will recognize your face, I won’t say goodbye my friend, For you and I will meet again. ~ Tom Petty

Hiking the Appalachian Trail is an amazing thing, primarily because of the hiking community that you encounter.  I encounter the same sort of thing at the Burning Man Festival that I have attended a number of times and have written a piece on the similarities between Burning Man & The Appalachian Trail.

happiness burning man

Rev Kane in his first year at Burning Man

Like being on the trail, at Burning Man you meet an incredible group of people.  People who are kinder than the folks you normally encounter, giving, open and people of a similar mindset to you in many ways.  The normal stresses of life are put on hold and you get to relax in a way you never get to in your day to day, default life.  One of the things that you notice at Burning Man is that after the week is over, once people hit the tarmac, they start to revert to the same behaviors they normally exhibit off the playa and it begins to bum you out.  Then, once you get back to the default world, you quickly remember why your time at Burning Man, or on the trail was so special.  You quickly get disillusioned with society and the people you encounter.  You long for the community you left behind and it leads to in the case of Burning Man, to what I call Post Playa Depression and the link will lead you to a piece I wrote on this years ago called Burning Man Disconnection.

6Now that you’re off the trail you’ll feel some of these same feelings, we miss our trail family.  Life is now much more complex and not nearly as satisfying as life on the trail.  Being on the trail we had clear, defined and simple goals – hike to that point from this point.  We feel bummed out by all of these things, so what do we do?

Brassie Brook Shelter

Brassie Brook Shelter

The very first thing I would say is be careful with any big decisions you have decided to make.  If it’s something you’ve been thinking about for months on the trail you’re probably ok.  But if it’s a sudden decision your making, one you haven’t been considering on the trail, be careful my friends, take your time before acting and make sure it’s a good decision and not one born out of your longing for the connections you’re feeling distant from.

self 0Stay connected, your trail family is still out there and they’re feeling the same way you are so reach out.  Give them a call, drop them a note, plan a hike somewhere with one or all of them.  Write about your experiences, in a book, a blog, or even just in your own journal.  Remind yourself of all of the positive things you have just experienced.  Then, start planning your next adventure, you’ve just done something completely out of the box and utterly amazing, what’s next for you, the possibilities are endless.

The original AARP group after their climb out of the NOC

The original AARP group after their climb out of the NOC

Stay in shape, don’t underestimate the positive impacts of the daily exercise regime you’ve been implementing for the last few months.  Sure, you aren’t going to replicate walking eight plus hours a day with weight on your back, but you can stay active, walking, biking, running or the gym.  Keep exercising daily, exercise will not only keep you fit and keep off post trail weight, but regular exercise has an impact on your mood.  Likewise, get off your trail diet and back to eating less and more balanced.

Beaver Pond on the trail

Beaver Pond on the trail

Finally, stay happy, do the basic things we know help make people happier.  Exercise, express gratitude, get enough sleep, smile, be altruistic and tell people about what you just did.  People love hearing about the trail, they love to live vicariously through our experiences, it will make you feel good and get you more than a couple of free drinks.

3 q day 1Also, feel free to reach out to the hiking community, that includes me, find someone to talk to if you are feeling down and I mean this my friends.  If you need to talk, I’m here and so are your fellow brothers and sisters from the hiking community.  We were there for each other on the trail and we can be here for each other off the trail and make sure that we’ll all continue to have happy days my friends ~ Rev Kane

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