Happy Thanksgiving and on this day of thanks and community a few words by the Dalai Llama on community:
The compassionate mind is very important. Fear, anger, jealousy are based on a self-centered attitude. By developing a sense of caring for others’ well-being your heart automatically opens and that brings transparency, straightforwardness and honesty, which leads to friendship. We are social animals, and one individual’s survival relies entirely on the rest of the community. ~ Dalai Llama
If you have peace of mind, when you meet with problems and difficulties they won’t disturb your inner peace. You’ll be able to employ your human intelligence more effectively. But, if your mental state is disturbed, full of emotion, it is very difficult to cope with problems, because the mind that is full of emotion is biased, unable to see reality. So whatever you do will unrealistic and naturally fail. ~ Dalai Llama
Don’t let yesterday use up too much of today. ~ Cherokee Indian Proverb
So I sat down to work on my Ministry of Happiness post and decided tonight to work on talking about a very important concept, being present in your life. As with all of the topics I write about I take some time to peruse the web, to see what others have written, to see if there are resources that I can recommend to help you on your journey to a happier life. As will often happy I bumped into the Zenhabits site, and I do believe it is the one of the best sites on the web. At times I’ve referred you to the site to check out a particular resource or item, however tonight I find myself utterly impressed with their post on being present. So, because there is wisdom in knowing when someone has done something better than you can, I will refer you to their amazing piece on being present. And in the spirit of being present in our over stimulated, multitasking world, take a few minutes to do nothing but focus on the article and let it sink in, great way to start a shortened holiday week, here’s the link:
A simple guide to being present for the overwhelmed and overworked
You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present. ~ Jan Glidewell
Remember the Sweet Things – The best story you’ll ever hear!
Happiness, Worry & The Dalai Lama’s Thoughts
Material progress and a higher standard of living bring us greater comfort and health, but do not lead to a transformation of the mind, which is the only thing capable of providing lasting peace. Profound happiness, unlike fleeting pleasures, is spiritual in nature. It depends on the happiness of others and it is based on love and affection.
According to my own experience, the highest level of inner calm comes from the development of love and compassion. The more concerned we are with the happiness of others, the more we increase our own well-being. Friendliness and warmth towards others allow us to relax and help us to dispel any sense of fear or insecurity so we can overcome whatever obstacles we face. ~Dalai Lama
Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars. ~ Kahlil Gibran
Life is hard, and if we are to be happy in this hard existence we must remember to focus on the good things. This is not easy. This is not easy at all when a family member is diagnosed with cancer, when your child is having problems in school or in life, or when someone breaks into your home and threatens your very security. We hold so many things dear and when those things, whether they be material things or the more important safety, security or health are threatened, then life seems like it can break us. We can feel our lives to be an insurmountable obstacle that we can neither climb nor escape from, not even for what would be just a precious few hours of rest and peace. When we are at this point and our mental reserves are shot we cannot be there for our loved ones the way would like to be, the way they need us to be. So what do you do?
Taoist philosophy tells us to be patient, there are so many things in life that we cannot control it is useless to waist your energy against an immovable obstacle. So be patient and wait, wait for what you can control, what you can change and then move. This is excellent advice, but what do you do while you’re waiting for that opportunity to change things. You focus on the good things, the cliché is, count your blessings, but it is a worthwhile exercise. And while you are thinking about the good in your life, make sure you smile.
The quote below from Mother Teresa is one of my favorites, “We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do.” Because what we must remember is that a smile, even if forced, will make us feel just a little bit better and that’s a start. Even more importantly, in the middle of our pain, or grief, or frustration, by smiling we still can help others. Sometimes in the middle of a purely shit day, a smile from a friend or even a stranger can turn things around. And if you’re smiling at them, they’re likely to smile back and make both of your days just a little bit better. So smile sunshine, things will get better.
We shall never know all the good that a simple smile can do. ~ Mother Teresa
Fear is Killing Your Happiness
Our Best Happiness Posts of 2015
Material progress and a higher standard of living improve comfort and health but do not lead to a transformation of the mind, the only thing capable of providing lasting peace. Profound happiness, unlike fleeting pleasures, is spiritual by nature. It depends on the happiness of others, and it is based on love and tenderness. ~ Dalai Lama
Often people attempt to live their lives backwards; they try to have more things, or more money, in order to do more of what they want, so they will be happier. The way it actually works is the reverse. You must first be who you really are, then do what you need to do, in order to have what you want. ~ Margaret Young
It’s important in our lives to have someone outside of us who can reflect honesty back upon us. We all lie to ourselves, I don’t eat that much, I don’t drink a lot of coffee, I get enough sleep, we all tell ourselves things that are not true. Most of these are innocuous lies that don’t have much impact, but some of these lies to impinge upon our happiness. I serve this role for my friends, perhaps a bit more vigorously than I need to, but in the end I am the one person many of my friends know will tell them the truth no matter what the consequences. Of course this also leads to the other side of the coin, they will often not ask me questions because they are afraid of the answer. However this is a trade-off I accept as it seems that the questions they avoid are a lot less serious than the ones they ask.
I remember back in graduate school I had become friends with a really pretty undergraduate, I had a bit of a crush on her but it was obvious that was never going anywhere and she was a lot of fun to hang out with. One day, excitedly she rushed up to me and asked, “How do you like my new hairdo?” “It looks like shit,” I replied and she burst into tears and called me several names and pointed out that I was a mean evil bastard. You see she’d been getting compliments all day on her new hair cut. A funny thing happened when she related this story to her friends, some started to back track on their previous compliments. You see I was the bad guy so they weren’t the ones who were hurting her feelings. In the end it came out, the hair cut wasn’t so great.
Now granted I could have been more diplomatic in my response, but in the end she became one of those people who knew she could trust to tell her the truth. We all need these people in our lives because we can’t move forward in our pursuit of happiness without a true accounting of what our life really is at present. So find some honest reflection in yourself or another and I promise you’ll have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane
Fear is Killing Your Happiness
Our Best Happiness Posts of 2015
Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude. ~ Denis Waitley
One of the ways in which you can improve you level of happiness is to be grateful for the things you have. Recently on the campus where I work one of our instructors is running a holiday health competition. In this competition you get points for various activities like exercising, sleeping enough, eating right and for expressing how grateful you are for something each day. A really amazing combination of showing gratitude while also doing other behaviors to make yourself more healthy, in itself, another way to increase your level of happiness.
In searching around the web I found a site that provides ten steps to increasing your level of gratitude and by connection your happiness, the site references a study that shows that being grateful can increase your happiness. Take a look at the article it offers some great advice.
Ten Grateful Steps to Happiness
Quotes about Happiness, Gratitude & Kindness
Friends, Joy, Gratitude & Transitions
Videos on Happiness, Gratitude & Kindness
A Heart Warming Story to Kick off your Monday
Jorge Munoz has been nominated as a CNN Hero and he explains how although he is not paid for his effort he has a bank account full of smiles. A concrete example of how giving to others can help increase your own happiness in today’s world. You don’t have to do something at the level that Jorge has undertaken but you can do something small. At the college where I work, occasionally I find a student in line in front of me at the cafeteria digging for money, sometimes it’s an extra nickel or quarter, and sometimes they’ve forgotten or can’t find their cash. So I’ll just pay for their lunch, it feels good to help someone out but the best part is how freaked out and happy they always are when it happens. So, here is Jorge’s story and if you’re having a bad Monday, try doing something nice for someone else. Who knows, on another bad Monday maybe someone will do something nice for you.
http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/10/28/munoz.sharing/index.html?hpt=Sbin
The Ministry of Happiness 