Happiness is Poetry: Gregory Corso

Happiness is Poetry: Gregory Corso

Gregory Corso, poetry, poet

Gregory Corso

I remember the people I knew in prison; I was very fortunate to know them – they came from 1910, 1920, 1930. ~ Gregory Corso

Another poet I found via the American Bible of Outlaw Poetry.  I love the picture above it really seems to fit his words.  The second poem, The American Way, was written in 1970, if someone had told me 2017, I wouldn’t have blinked, funny that. ~ Rev Kane

The Whole Mess … Almost

I ran up six flights of stairs
to my small furnished room
opened the window
and began throwing out
those things most important in life
First to go, Truth, squealing like a fink:
“Don’t! I’ll tell awful things about you!”
“Oh yeah? Well, I’ve nothing to hide … OUT!”
Then went God, glowering & whimpering in amazement:
“It’s not my fault! I’m not the cause of it all!” “OUT!”
Then Love, cooing bribes: “You’ll never know impotency!
All the girls on Vogue covers, all yours!”
I pushed her fat ass out and screamed:
“You always end up a bummer!”
I picked up Faith Hope Charity
all three clinging together:
“Without us you’ll surely die!”
“With you I’m going nuts! Goodbye!”
Then Beauty … ah, Beauty—
As I led her to the window
I told her: “You I loved best in life
… but you’re a killer; Beauty kills!”
Not really meaning to drop her
I immediately ran downstairs
getting there just in time to catch her
“You saved me!” she cried
I put her down and told her: “Move on.”
Went back up those six flights
went to the money
there was no money to throw out.
The only thing left in the room was Death
hiding beneath the kitchen sink:
“I’m not real!” It cried
“I’m just a rumor spread by life … ”
Laughing I threw it out, kitchen sink and all
and suddenly realized Humor
was all that was left—
All I could do with Humor was to say:
“Out the window with the window!”

The American Way

1
I am a great American
I am almost nationalistic about it!
I love America like a madness!
But I am afraid to return to America
I’m even afraid to go into the American Express—
2
They are frankensteining Christ in America
         in their Sunday campaigns
They are putting the fear of Christ in America
         under their tents in their Sunday campaigns
They are driving old ladies mad with Christ in America
They are televising the gift of healing and the fear of hell
         in America under their tents in their Sunday
         campaigns
They are leaving their tents and are bringing their Christ
         to the stadiums of America in their Sunday
         campaigns
They are asking for a full house an all get out
         for their Christ in the stadiums of America
They are getting them in their Sunday and Saturday
         campaigns
They are asking them to come forward and fall on their
         knees
         because they are all guilty and they are coming
         forward
         in guilt and are falling on their knees weeping their
         guilt
         begging to be saved O Lord O Lord in their Monday
         Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday
         and Sunday campaigns
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It is a time in which no man is extremely wondrous
It is a time in which rock stupidity
         outsteps the 5th Column as the sole enemy in America
It is a time in which ignorance is a good Ameri-cun
         ignorance is excused only where it is so
         it is not so in America
Man is not guilty   Christ is not to be feared
I am telling you the American Way is a hideous monster
         eating Christ   making Him into Oreos and Dr. Pepper
         the sacrament of its foul mouth
I am telling you the devil is impersonating Christ in America
America’s educators & preachers are the mental-dictators
         of false intelligence   they will not allow America
         to be smart
         they will only allow death to make America smart
Educators & communicators are the lackeys of the
         American Way
They enslave the minds of the young
         and the young are willing slaves (but not for long)
         because who is to doubt the American Way
         is not the way?
The duty of these educators is no different
         than the duty of a factory foreman
Replica production   make all the young think alike
         dress alike   believe alike   do alike
Togetherness   this is the American Way
The few great educators in America are weak & helpless
They abide   and so uphold the American Way
Wars have seen such men   they who despised things about
         them
         but did nothing   and they are the most dangerous
Dangerous because their intelligence is not denied
         and so give faith to the young
         who rightfully believe in their intelligence
Smoke this cigarette doctors smoke this cigarette
         and doctors know
Educators know   but they dare not speak their know
The victory that is man is made sad in this fix
Youth can only know the victory of being born
         all else is stemmed   until death be the final victory
         and a merciful one at that
If America falls it will be the blame of its educators
         preachers   communicators   alike
America today is America’s greatest threat
We are old when we are young
America is always new   the world is always new
The meaning of the world is birth not death
Growth gone in the wrong direction
The true direction grows ever young
In this direction what grows grows old
A strange mistake   a strange and sad mistake
         for it has grown into an old thing
         while all else around it is new
Rockets will not make it any younger—
And what made America decide to grow?
I do not know   I can only hold it to the strangeness in man
And America has grown into the American Way—
To be young is to be ever purposeful   limitless
To grow is to know limit   purposelessness
Each age is a new age
How outrageous it is that something old and sad
         from the pre-age incorporates each new age—
Do I say the Declaration of Independence is old?
Yes I say what was good for 1789, is not good for 1960
It was right and new to say all men were created equal
         because it was a light then
But today it is tragic to say it
         today it should be fact—
Man has been on earth a long time
One would think with his mania for growth
         he would, by now, have outgrown such things as
         constitutions manifestos codes commandments
         that he could well live in the world without them
         and know instinctively how to live and be
         —for what is being but the facility to love?
Was not that the true goal of growth, love?
Was not that Christ?
But man is strange and grows where he will
         and chalks it all up to Fate   whatever be—
America rings with such strangeness
It has grown into something strange and
         the American is good example of this mad growth
The boy man   big baby meat
         as though the womb were turned backwards
         giving birth to an old man
The victory that is man does not allow man
         to top off his empirical achievement with death
The Aztecs did it by yanking out young hearts
         at the height of their power
The Americans are doing it by feeding their young to the
         Way
For it was not the Spaniard who killed the Aztec
         but the Aztec who killed the Aztec
Rome is proof   Greece is proof   all history is proof
Victory does not allow degeneracy
It will not be the Communists will kill America
         no   but America itself—
The American Way   that sad mad process
         is not run by any one man or organization
It is a monster born of itself   existing of its self
The men who are employed by this monster
         are employed unknowingly
They reside in the higher echelons of intelligence
They are the educators the psychiatrists the ministers
         the writers the politicians the communicators
         the rich the entertainment world
And some follow and sing the Way because they sincerely
         believe it to be good
And some believe it holy and become minutemen in it
Some are in it simply to be in
And most are in it for gold
They do not see the Way as monster
They see it as the “Good Life”
What is the Way?
The Way was born out of the American Dream
         a nightmare—
The state of Americans today compared to the Americans
         of the 18th century proves the nightmare—
Not Franklin not Jefferson who speaks for America today
         but strange red-necked men of industry
         and the goofs of show business
Bizarre! Frightening! The Mickey Mouse sits on the throne
         and Hollywood has a vast supply—
Could grammar school youth seriously look upon
         a picture of George Washington and “Herman Borst”
         the famous night club comedian together at Valley
         Forge?
Old old and decadent   gone the dignity
         the American sun seems headed for the grave
O that youth might raise it anew!
The future depends solely on the young
The future is the property of the young
What the young know the future will know
What they are and do the future will be and do
What has been done must not be done again
Will the American Way allow this?
No.
I see in every American Express
         and in every army center in Europe
         I see the same face the same sound of voice
         the same clothes the same walk
I see mothers & fathers
         no difference among them
Replicas
They not only speak and walk and think alike
         they have the same face!
What did this monstrous thing?
What regiments a people so?
How strange is nature’s play on America
Surely were Lincoln alive today
         he could never be voted President   not with his
         looks—
Indeed Americans are babies all in the embrace
         of Mama Way
Did not Ike, when he visited the American Embassy in
         Paris a year ago, say to the staff—“Everything is fine,
         just drink Coca Cola, and everything will be all right.”
         This is true, and is on record
Did not American advertising call for TOGETHERNESS?
         not orgiasticly like today’s call
         nor as means to stem violence
         This is true, and is on record.
Are not the army centers in Europe ghettos?
         They are, and O how sad   how lost!
The PX newsstands are filled with comic books
The army movies are always Doris Day
What makes a people huddle so?
Why can’t they be universal?
Who has smalled them so?
This is serious! I do not mock or hate this
         I can only sense some mad vast conspiracy!
Helplessness is all it is!
They are caught   caught in the Way—
And those who seek to get out of the Way
         can not
The Beats are good example of this
They forsake the Way’s habits
         and acquire for themselves their own habits
And they become as distinct and regimented and lost
         as the main flow
         because the Way has many outlets
         like a snake of many tentacles—
There is no getting out of the Way
The only way out is the death of the Way
And what will kill the Way but a new consciousness
Something great and new and wonderful must happen
         to free man from this beast
It is a beast we can not see or even understand
For it be the condition of our minds
God how close to science fiction it all seems!
As if some power from another planet
         incorporated itself in the minds of us all
It could well be!
For as I live I swear America does not seem like America
         to me
Americans are a great people
I ask for some great and wondrous event
         that will free them from the Way
         and make them a glorious purposeful people once
         again
I do not know if that event is due   deserved
         or even possible
I can only hold that man is the victory of life
And I hold firm to American man
I see standing on the skin of the Way
         America   to be as proud and victorious as St.
         Michael on the neck of the fallen Lucifer—
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Happiness is Art – Great Paintings

Happiness is Art – Great Paintings

happiness, art

Every picture shows a spot with which the artist has fallen in love.                    ~ Alfred Sisley

Tonight a collection of really amazing paintings, many you’ve probably never seen before, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

The Ninth Wave by Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky

happiness, art

The Annunciation by Fra Angelico

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The Desperate Man by Gustave Courbet

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The Death of Marat by Jacques-Louis David

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Dante Illuminating Florence with his Poem by Domenico Di Michelino

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Suicide by George Grosz

happiness, art

The Fate of Animals by Frans Marc

happiness, art

The Apparition by Gustav Moreau

happiness, art

The Sleeping Gypsy by Henri Rousseau

happiness, art

Self-Portrait with a Sunflower by Anthony Van Dyck

happiness, art

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Happiness, Patience & Karma

Happiness, Patience & Karma

Karma wheel

The wheel

Karma moves in two directions. If we act virtuously, the seed we plant will result in happiness. If we act non-virtuously, suffering results. ~ Sakyong Mipham

I believe in Karma!  I don’t care how you look at it either, you can consider Karma acts of ethereal heavenly justice, the universe’s way of balancing itself, or even just the fact that people’s acts create actions that eventually reflect back on them the way a ripple in the pond reflects off the shore and returns.  Regardless of how or why, I believe the Wheel of Karma turns and good acts bring about good things in life.  It is one of the reasons I love the TV show My Name is Earl, in a good natured and nutty way it made this point episode after episode.

Unfortunately though, unlike in a TV show, the one thing most of us really dislike about Karma is its normal lack of speed.  As people, and I’m as guilty as the next, we lack patience, we want John Lennon’s Instant Karma.  (Ok admit it, your singing in your head right now, instant karma’s gonna get you.)  This is why patience is so important, when bad acts occur and particularly when people are consciously unkind to us or the ones we love, we want justice.  Although sometimes the speed of Karmic justice is occasionally fast, typically we have to wait many years, sometimes decades to see the Karma Wheel fully turn.

I truly believe that the way you deal with this, the peace  you practice, plays heavily into your own level of happiness.  Being patient means in some sense that you are letting go of the negative feelings, the stress and energy.  You are taking faith in the idea that things will work out and they usually do.  Being able to do that, letting the wheel turn, will make you a happier person and keep you from personally acting in ways that will create your own negative Karma.

So my friends, take a breath, breathing is always the starting point, relax, you don’t have to forget, but let the wheel work it’s course.  I know it’s hard, you feel cheated, that bad people get away with bad things, but they don’t, not forever.  So have a happy day my friends and let the wheel turn.  ~ Rev Kane

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happiness and the Benefits of Gratitude

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Happiness is a Choice

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Is this the End? = My Covid Times Diary

Is this the End? –  My Covid Times Diary

dystopia, covid timesThe species will continue, whatever apocalypse we manage to unleash. It just won’t be much fun to live through. ~ Naomi Alderman

A reminder that these Covid Times posts are a departure from our standard Ministry of Happiness fare.  These pieces are meant to be thoughts and musings, a record of my life and mental state during the coronavirus pandemic.

Tonight I want to talk about the American Dream and the coronavirus.   Actually I want to talk about the death of the American Dream.  Let me define very specifically what I mean by the American Dream.  Put into simple terms I’m defining the traditional American Dream as the idea that your children will be more successful in their life than you were in yours.  It’s a very capitalistic sort of an idea.  In this country we have specifically not defined success as being happy or well adjusted or self-actuated.  We’ve in a very Capitalistic way focused on the luxuriation of the lower levels of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

maslow, dystopiaYou see what goes for success in America has been that each generation, gets a better education, a bigger house, a nicer car and better vacations than the previous.  Basically this has meant fulfilling our physiological and safety needs in more luxurious forms, with some really nice vacations thrown in.  The thing is, since the 1950’s, in America this dream has been achievable.

My grandparents, (for the most part the children of immigrants), were born citizens in this country.  They had steady work during their lives, bought modest houses and earned pensions.  Things their parents could only have dreamt of having in their lives.

My parents, children of the 40’s and the veterans of World War II, got better jobs than their parents, made more money, took those better vacations (Cape Cod in my family’s case).  They bought a better house, their kids (me and my siblings) were the first in our family to go to college.  So you see that dream continued on to my generation, the children of the 60’s and 70’s.

We have better jobs than our parents did, I went to college and make more money in one year than my parents made combined in any one year.  So by the simple Capitalistic metrics of the traditional American Dream my generation has been a success, but what about the next generation?

What about our children?  It has seemed to me that we are reaching a point where the traditional American Dream no longer holds up.  Our generation has potentially hit a bit of a pinnacle.  People in my generation not only went to college, we went to graduate school.  We have gotten excellent jobs and given the stock market has generally risen over our entire lifetimes, those of us who have invested either on our own, or through our pensions at work (401ks) have seen our wealth grow to levels our parents never imagined.  Our vacations have even for some of us become international in nature.

How can our children top that?   There are only so many slots in the top echelons of employment.  The realities of the raising costs of higher education have meant it’s harder to get an equivalent level of education to that of their parents.  Housing prices have also skyrocketed in many parts of the country making home ownership, one of the core fundamental metrics of success in America, harder to attain.  Which means one of the fundamental ways in which families build wealth is ever increasingly out of reach.

So the next generation is paying more for education, will be less likely to build wealth through home ownership, and are unlikely to exceed their parents in either of these categories, type of job or likely total earnings and wealth.  That’s just the starting point.

Looking into the future, we can see a world where global warning will likely begin to have serious economical and societal impacts.  And now, just as that generation has started it’s career, or is about to, they have found themselves living through the coronavirus pandemic and the coming historic economic downturn.

I’m not going to talk about the health impacts we’re facing in our Covid Times’ lives.  But the even more far reaching economic impacts, since those will most acutely impact the traditional American Dream.  Over the last few weeks, somewhere in the neighborhood of seventeen million people have filed for unemployment.  Roughly four million or so per week.  That is not necessarily expected to slow down immediately.  It is entirely possible that over the next month the unemployment rate for the United States could reach between 20 and 30%.  As a reference point the highest unemployment rate during the Great Depression was 24.9%.  Hopefully, there will be a quicker recovery given the nature of this economic impact, because the unemployment rate stayed at 14% for ten years after the Great Depression.

So, given all of this, I think it’s a safe time to ask, is this the end of the American Dream?

Just another way anxious thoughts of life in Covid Times has taken form.

~ Michael ‘Rev’ Kane

Other Life in Covid Times Posts

Life in Covid Times – Inequality

Life in Covid times – Fear

Life in Covid Times – Anxiety

Life in Covid Times – You will never be the same again

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Travel Memories in Covid Times

Travel Memories in Covid Times

rev kane cobra selfieA mind that is stretched by a new experience can never return to its original dimensions.    ~ Oliver Wendell Holmes

So we’re all on shelter in place orders here in California and we have been for six or seven weeks, honestly it’s easy to lose track when every day is the same.  If you read this blog regularly you know that travel is a big part of my life, my happiness, and my very soul.  I write about it often, I’ve written a book about my time on the Appalachian Trail.  So while sheltering in place, and not being able to travel and not even seeing a prospect of doing the type of travel I like to do, anytime soon.  I’ve really for that reason, kept my mind off of traveling, my future plans or the potential missed opportunities we’re all losing out on right now.  I just simply felt that it would be better for my mental state not to think or dwell on that reality given everything that is going on in the world.

But as we all know, nothing you’re trying not to think about stays down very long.  For me, it is often music that takes me into mental spaces I’m trying to avoid.  It’s music that often triggers my writing, particularly my poetry work like the things I wrote about in Otherness and Athena’s Addict.  So I was driving the other day and one of  my favorite songs came on, Marrakesh Express, by Crosby, Stills and Nash.  I’ve heard that song for most of my life and honestly it put taking the Marrakesh Express on my bucket list.  When I finally decided I would visit Morocco I immediately investigated the idea.  To be fully transparent, I actually took it the other way from Marrakesh through Casablanca to Tangier.  I of course had my MP3 player, of course at one point I listened to the song and was blissfully happy for the double reality of the song and finally realizing one of my dreams of being on that train.

marrakesh train station

The Marrakech Train Station

So often you dream about something for so log that when it actually happens it turns out to be a bit of a let down.  The thing is, that trip didn’t let me down even a little bit.  Leaving the madness of Marrakesh was truly a relief.  I both loved and loathed my time in Marrakesh.  I had spent three full days living in the old city and it was madness.  While spectacular in every moment, while I loved so many things, the old city is a mental and sensory overload.  You spend every minute being both pleased and assaulted on all of your senses at once.  The people are amazing but also you get solicited more times per minute there, than any place that I have ever been.  During my time there, I saw amazing beauty, I saw ugliness, I saw kind and amazing people and every level of con man you can imagine.  The word cacophony was viscerally defined for me.  I loved it, but it wore me out in ways I couldn’t possibly have expected.

I walked to the train station to board the train, I was tired and excited to be ticking off a bucket list item.  Getting ticketed for the train turned out to be a minor adventure by itself.  I also ended up eating at Kentucky Fried Chicken at the train station and had a spicy chicken and rice dish there that I wish they served here, if they did I’d eat at Kentucky Fried Chicken all of the time, it was absolutely amazing.

Snake charmer in Jemaa el-Fnaa Square in Marrakech

I climbed on to the train and sat down in one of the cars.  The cars were divided into small cabins with two rows of three seats facing each other.  Our car would eventually fill with all six seats being occupied for a time.  The first person to enter the cabin was a beautiful young woman, I casually said hello.  She seemed a bit aloof and honestly now I no longer remember what exactly broke the ice but we began to talk.  It turned out, she was a traveler as well, she had been learning English in Canada I believe, had spent time in Spain and was from Brazil.  I won’t go into the details but she had not enjoyed her time in Morocco, we got involved in a really deep discussion of culture, misogyny, travel and our experiences.  Our conversation flowed uninterrupted for the three or fours hours it took to arrive in Casablanca where we parted ways.  In addition to being an amazing conversation, to her being an amazing and beautiful woman, there was another reason this is one of the best conversations I’ve ever had.  You see our conversation bounced between three languages, we danced between Spanish, English and Portuguese in a way that was far more comfortable than my ability in those languages should have allowed for, it was a truly special time and conversation with a special person.  A couple of times I actually noticed the other inhabitants of the cabin looking at us with a look on their face that seemed to say, who the hell are these people?

So this was the memory that passed across me the other day and made me smile for a couple of reasons.  First it was a great memory that brought me pleasure, secondly it seemed to trigger the universe.  Hannah posted something on Instagram that night, I messaged her and we talked about that conversation briefly, she remarked it was the best time she had in Morocco.  I expressed a hope that someday we’d cross paths again when were both on the road and get to talk again.  But the thing that was really awesome was this memory experience, being so positive, didn’t make me feel worse about our shelter in place reality, it actually made me feel better.  One of the hopes I’ve always had for my life was that my travels, when I’m older and perhaps unable to travel, would remain a source of satisfaction, comfort and happiness for me.  It seems that really will be the case and hopefully travel will do it for you as well, but it certainly has, and seemingly will continue to provide me with happy days my friends.  ~ Rev Kane

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Happiness is Photography: Scotland

Happiness is Photography: Scotland

Plenty of people miss their share of happiness, not because they never found it, but because they didn’t stop to enjoy it.  ~William Feather

happiness scotland

Rev Kane goin native in the Scottish Highlands

Five years ago I had the pleasure of walking across Scotland, from Fort Williams to Inverness via The Great Glenn way.  A really pleasant walking trip about 6 days, staying each night at inns and B&B’s.  I was fortunate to see very little rain, low levels of midges and to be walking while a flotilla was moving day-to-day along the same path along the lochs.  The Scottish people are wonderful, kind, welcoming and in an instant will invite a wild looking red bearded American to dinner with family and a glass of whiskey.  Here are some images from my trip.   In Scotland I had nothing but happy days my friends.  ~ Rev Kane

100_0597invermorsten bridge

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Loch Ness

Loch Ness

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Loch Lochy

Loch Lochy

Flotilla with Viking boat trailing

Flotilla with Viking boat trailing

Highland Cows

Highland Cows

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Have to love Scottish town names

Have to love Scottish town names

Drumnadrochit, home of 2 Loch Ness Monster Museums

Drumnadrochit, home of 2 Loch Ness Monster Museums

Lake overlooking Inverness

Pond overlooking Inverness

Edinburgh Castle

Edinburgh Castle

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Happiness is Photography: St. Boniface Cemetery

Happiness is Photography: St. Boniface Cemetery

fix st boniface 1
To me, photography is an art of observation. It’s about finding something interesting in an ordinary place… I’ve found it has little to do with the things you see and everything to do with the way you see them. ~ Elliott Erwitt

On the trip I took in October to photograph Polar Bears, I spent two days in Winnipeg checking out the city.  One of the places that was recommended to me were the ground of St. Boniface Cathedral.  The grounds were beautiful and I did not make it into the cathedral itself, but on a beautiful fall sunny day I took some time photographing the cemetery there.  Cemeteries are one of my favorite mediums for photography and this one was particularly pretty.  So just some pretty pictures tonight, click on the images to enlarge them, enjoy and have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

fix cem 1 fix church top fix flowers 2fix people 2 fix flowers fix jesus statues 2 fix jesus statues fix monument 2 fix monumentfix people fix weep 1 fix weep 2IMGP8880

Other pieces with photograph that you might enjoy!

My photo site, ZD Blue Images – Tasting life with your eyes

Burning Man – 2014

Happiness is Photography: Ireland

Great Photography Sites

Happiness is Photography: Scotland

The Himalayas

More Burning Man

 

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Happiness is Art: Andy Warhol

Happiness is Art: Andy Warhol

andy warholEveryone needs a fantasy ~ Andy Warhol

Andy Warhol was a freakin genius! I say that as someone who quite honestly never really dug his work.  The pop art thing never really did it for me.  Not that I don’t dig some of the things he did.  His multi-media concert work was brilliant, I like the pieces I’m including with this post, I think the cows are oddly soothing.

andy warhol cowsBut Warhol was certainly a genius, he figured out how to make his art cool and popular, he seemingly could see the avant garde edge of society.  Essentially from my perspective he was able to see everything that I hate about society, fads, trends, what’s cool, right now!  But I appreciate that genius, and I do credit him for also being able to maneuver within that sliver of edge time and at times, change it’s direction.  It is a shame that his life was cut short, it would have been very interesting to see what he would have done next.

andy warhol marilynIt’s been a Warhol kind of year for me, I visited the Warhol Museum in Pittsburgh in October, it’s a really cool place and one of the more interesting museums I’ve ever attended.  For Warholics, is that a thing, it must be damn near heaven, you can almost believe you’re in the factory at times.

andy warhol couchToday I visited the traveling Warhol exhibit at the Crocker Art Museum in Sacramento.  I love the Crocker, the Warhol exhibit was a little bit of a let down, too much focus on his screen print and painted portraits.  Although there were two really cool features to the exhibit.  There was a factory room for kids of all ages where you could make your own art as well as a set up to do your own screen test and have it emailed out to you.  I think it would have been better if the tests were also looped and displayed but I’m nit picking.

One side note today I also discovered the art of Eduardo Carrillo, his stuff is very cool.  Here are a few of his pieces, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

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Some Other Posts You May Enjoy!

Happiness is Art: Storytelling

Great Paintings

Street Art

The Art of Burning Man

Sculptures in the Desert

Happiness is Sculptural Weaving

 

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A Shout Out to Parents

A Shout Out to Parents

parents, familyTrust yourself. You know more than you think you do. ~ Benjamin Spock

First, let me define what I mean by the term parent, by that term I mean anyone raising a child.  So, technically you might be a mom, dad, uncle, aunt, grandparent, cousin, older sibling, etc…a foster parent or a parent who has adopted someone.  I also mean parents in any configuration, single parent, paired parents, two moms, two dads, one of each, three whatever group or person who is actively working to raise a child in my book is a parent.

Right now being a parent has changed pretty rapidly and drastically.  A lot of parents are finding themselves spending a LOT more time with their kids.  Many of you have become home school teachers and a lot of you are trying to work from home with kids running around while simultaneously working.  Honestly I’ve actually enjoyed seeing munchkins Zoom bombing meetings their parents are having with me, but it’s difficult to work, teach, meet, take care of a home and stay sane all at the same time.

I see a lot of parents right now lamenting that they may not be doing a great job parenting.  I understand the feeling, things are stressed and crazy and certainly very not normal and there will be times and days where it all feels like it’s falling apart.  Breathe, relax, you’re doing the best you can, and likely doing far better than you realize.  I’m watching friends and relatives who are parents becoming gym teachers, crafting supervisors, teaching munchkins to bake, finding ways to make sweet gestures.  You all are doing a good job.

The thing I would like to remind you of is your own childhood.  At least for me, the memories that are most impactful from my childhood are the little things and tonight while cooking dinner I had one of those memories.  I was making raviolis tonight for dinner, I had a mix of meat and cheese raviolis and it brought back a really specific memory.  I was an insanely picky eater as a kid, I didn’t eat cheese raviolis.  So my mother, after working all day, coming home and cooking had to pick through the raviolis to sort out the meat ones for my plate before putting on the sauce and serving dinner.  Such a small thing but it was important to me that she would always make that effort to make me happy.

You, as parents, are likely doing a dozen of those types of things every day.  From going out to buy ice cream, to peeling a banana, or making a special dinner.  Perhaps it’s the way you tuck them in at night or the book you’ve read for the 100th time or letting your kid wear their Santa suit for the tenth day in a row, in March.

Especially little kids, they might not see it now, you might not see it now, but trust me my friends.  Some day your kids are going to look back on this time and explain to you how special you were to them during all of this.  Hold on to that thought, don’t be so hard on yourselves and have a happy day my friends.  ~ Rev Kane

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My Covid Times Diary – The Great Pause

My Covid Times Diary – The Great Pause

coronavirus pauseYou cannot fast-forward time, you cannot rewind it, and you cannot pause it; you can only waste or benefit from it. ~ Matshona Dhliwayo

I was thinking the other day while out on a run about what this shelter in place time really means for us.  Seems to me that in many ways this is a great pause.  The situation has put so many things on hold.  For me personally, it has put some travel plans on hold, the opportunity to see my oldest niece graduate from high school, a chance to see my littlest niece before her first birthday, but nothing too serious for me.  At my college it gets a little more serious, due to the hands on nature of some of our career technical courses, we’ve had to pause those classes.  This means that some students who fully expected to be completing certificates or degrees in those ares won’t be able to do that for a time.  I imagine for a lot of people a lot of things are on pause, birthday celebrations, weddings, celebrations of all kinds.  Given both the health and economic realities we’re facing, a whole lot of things, for a whole lot of people are about to be on pause.

I think for a lot of people, the fear, anxiety and uncertain of this time leads to some less than ideal behavior.  It’s all too easy to let it get to you, to end up eating poorly, not exercising and finding yourself too often on the couch watching TV or Netflix with a bag of chips or cookies in your hand.  A few drinks too many are also easy to get into during uncertain times.  That’s another way that this can be a great pause, if you just try an hunker down and avoid the whole damn thing. And honestly, a little bit of that is probably not the worst thing right now.  We all live too fast and try to do too much, if this situation allows for a little pause to all of that, that’s ok, might even be a good thing.  Now I know those of you with little kids who are reading this are likely thinking how wonderful it would be for any pause right now.  Especially those of you who are working, home schooling and trying to take care of a home and family.  Obviously, this post won’t be so relevant to you right now.  But please know I admire what you’re doing, what you’re going through and hopefully in the long run they’ll be some silver linings out of this you can’t see right now.

The question for all of us is at this point, what do you do with the pause?  From the quote above, we have two choices, “we can only waste or benefit from this pause.”  So which will it be my friends, will you waste or benefit from the great pause?

Personally, I’m trying to do my best to benefit from it.  I started this week getting better about working out more consistently and getting a bit more writing done.  Over the last few years I’ve been completing a book a year and it’s been tough this year to commit to finishing another, but today I decided which one I’ll focus on and complete by December.  This means scheduling regular writing time and given that I’m working and working out from home, I’m saving the drive time and hopefully I can put that toward my writing project and get the book done.

We all have those sorts of things we can work if we have a little extra time during the great pause.  So what can you do my friends, how will you benefit from the great pause?

~ Michael ‘Rev’ Kane

 

Other Life in Covid Times Posts

You will never be the same again

Life in Covid Times – Inequality

Life in Covid Times – Fear

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