Finding Silver Linings in Hard Times

Posted on January 28, 2021 by Michael Kane

Finding Silver Linings in Hard Times

happy, sprinkler

It’s funny how, when things seem the darkest, moments of beauty present themselves in the most unexpected places. ~ Karen Marie Moning

Modern live is full of anxiety, our 24 hour news cycle and the internet keep us thoroughly informed of every disaster, horror and reason for worry anywhere on the planet.  Add to that an actual worry with the coronavirus outbreak and life can be anxiety filled indeed.

During these times we have a lot of things we need to be doing.  Many are losing hours due to lack of work, stores are running out of certain foods and health products.  We are worried about getting us or loved ones getting sick and trying to follow the social distancing protocols the government is asking us to entertain.  People are being inconvenienced in so many ways, lack of child care, canceled trips and vacations, having to find new ways to work remotely.

So where are the silver linings?  They’re actually all around us.  Social distancing and isolation sounds really terrible.  But let’s also remember that social distancing doesn’t mean you have to stay locked in your house.  You can go out for a hike, or a stroll in a park.  I saw a family today playing ball together in a field.  This can be an opportunity to do some family activities together that don’t involve electronic devices.  Lord knows we will all get plenty of time during this time of coronavirus to burn through our Netflix, Hulu and Amazon Prime ques, while adding new services like CBS All Access, Disney+ etc…  But you also have time to read and get your kids to read more.

Although I’m a huge introvert and already spend a lot of time socially isolated, I will have even more time at home.  So how am I going to use this extra time to my advantage?  Mostly I’m going to put energy into things I always want more time to do.  So I’ll be writing more, working on my Spanish, practicing guitar, doing some photography and organizing photos.  This is a chance to cook more and get creative cooking with what you have in the house.

For those of you with the difficult task of keeping children entertained during this time.  there are a lot of possibilities.  Hopefully you stocked up on arts and crafts supplies, there are lot of internet resources including virtually experiencing the flight of Apollo 13, lots of museums who’ve put parts of their collections online and it’s a great time to help kids expand their skills.  Build something with them, paint something and just play silly games with them.  Make up crazy stories, who knows, you could turn into the next J.K. Rowling or JRR Tolkein.

Basically, as always, happiness and your attitude are a choice.  You can choose to feel trapped and miserable and get lost in worry.  Or you can take it as a fun challenge and find ways to make it enjoyable.  But I’m not stupid, I realize that at some point if this goes on long enough it will get frustrating, you’ll get down.  So remember to also be creative about finding ways to take care of yourself and get what you need.  Feeling better also helps keep your immune system working.  So have happy days my friends and stay well and safe.        ~ Rev Kane

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My COVID Times Diary: Peaks

Posted on January 27, 2021 by Michael Kane

My COVID Times Diary: Peaks

Everest

Sunset in the Himalayas

The only way to get to that next peak is to be ready for that next valley. Being raised Irish, you know to always be ready for the bad times. ~ Rory O’Malley

Today, the day I’m writing this piece, January 23, 2021 seams to be the current peak of the current COVID pandemic in the United States.  There has been a lot of reporting in the news about how the pandemic is peaking.  And currently, we are absolutely at a peak and it’s a horrible one.  Currently there are around 200,000 people a day testing positive and well over 3500 Americans dying everyday in America.  This peak is the highest number for both of these terrible metrics.  And correspondingly, we are starting to see, and expect to see a dip in both numbers.  People are very optimistic about all of this especially in light of the continued, albeit not effective, rollout of the vaccine.  That’s great, and if people do what they should, continue to mask, social distance and get vaccinated, this could become the beginning of a decline that leads to very low levels of infection and a resumption of very near to a pre-COVID level of normal life.  But if we don’t, well, this isn’t the first peak and a lesson we need to learn from that is that even after a peak, the numbers can go up, they have before.

covid, coronavirusAs you can see from the image above that shows the number of infections over time, that our current peak is the fifth and highest peak so we have experienced so far in this pandemic.  As you can see, the number of infections is declining sharply at the moment, just like it did for each of the last three peaks.  I also think it’s important to note that in the first two peaks of the virus, when we had higher participation rates in the shutdown and social distancing, we did in fact flatten the curve.  As people have tired of taking precautions and as we rolled into the holiday season, we failed miserably at flattening the infection curve.  The figure truly shows that simply and clearly, it’s up to us and as we’ve decided to act irresponsibly, infections have risen.  It also shows that there is a cycle to the infections, as infections rise, people do in fact get more careful and infection drops.

So, I’m also optimistic that this may be the beginning of a long-term decline in infection rates.  My optimism comes from first, that people are in fact showing up to get vaccinated.  Second, since things are so bad and people are starting to know someone who not just tested positive, but has had symptoms, they will, at least for a time, take the virus more seriously and take precautions.  The third is behavioral, in the western and southern parts of the US, weather starts improving from February into March giving people more options to be outdoors, reducing the perceived need to get together in indoor settings.  And, there are no traditional gathering holidays in front of us until Easter.  So I think this combination of factors means that we’ll see a decline in infection rates over the next three months.

There are of course caveats to my optimism.  If the issues with vaccine supply continue or get worse, if people’s optimism leads them to reducing precautions or if the new variants are indeed significantly more infectious than the rate of decline might slow.  If a number of these things come to pass, this may not be our last peak.

Wear a mask, socially distant and if able, get vaccinated.

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Happiness Moments: A Perfect Meal in Oaxaca

Posted on January 26, 2021 by Michael Kane

Happiness Moments: A Perfect Meal in Oaxaca

eating quote

So a new little writing experiment for the blog. I’ve been wanting to find a way to do some free writing as practice. And I’ve been wanting to capture the moments in my life that have brought me true happiness. I need that little pick me up right now with everything going on in the world and no real chance to travel. So, some writing about happy moments in my life, hope they bring you a little happiness too.

A couple of years ago I moved to Oaxaca City, Mexico for three months.  I went to Oaxaca for several reasons.  I wanted to do a few weeks of Spanish language skill, I wanted to live in another country for a time, I wanted to check out Oaxaca as a potential retirement location and finally, I was excited to be in Mexico for the Day of the Dead celebration.

My time in Oaxaca was wonderful.  The language school experience was wonderful, I loved my little apartment, the weather and city were spectacular and the Day of the Dead celebrations were fascinating.  Two things really stood out in Oaxaca, the tremendous amount of art that was present everywhere and the absolutely amazing food that was also available everywhere.  On top of the quality, given the economy, the price of the food is insanely inexpensive.  Across from my apartment was a little place called Tacos Roy.  At Tacos Roy, I could get my favorite type of tacos, a plate of 3 tacos al pastore as well as a bottle of coke for the equivalent of about $1.80 American.  Street tamales sold by the little old ladies in the neighborhood were the equivalent of a quarter American and they were fantastic.

Oaxaca is also known for queso Oaxaca which is a type of mozzarella made and sold in Oaxaca that you can find everywhere in Mexico and also in the US.  I ate many plates of enchiladas rojas and verdes con queso Oaxaca.

oaxaca enchiladaOne of the things that I also fell in love with in Oaxaca were sweet tamales.  The tamales are actually wrapped in banana leaves not corn husks.

oaxaca tamaleBut without a doubt the best meal I had in Oaxaca and one of the best meals of my life was at a restaurant aptly named Casa Oaxaca.  They have a great menu full of local ingredients with interesting and amazing dishes.  What always makes for a great meal is good company, a great location and of course amazing food.  First, it was a beautiful night and we were dining outside on the rooftop patio of the restaurant overlooking the major cathedral in Oaxaca.  I was dining with three women who I was taking Spanish language courses with and it was the last night for a couple of them, so the company was excellent.  Finally, the food was absolutely spectacular.  The appetizers were exotic and tasty including a ground fish and ant pate.  The entrees were unbelievable, Oaxaca is known for it’s moles and my dinner choice was a chicken with an almond mole.  I will tell you right now, there are a dizzy array of different moles in available in Oaxaca, but the almond mole was so incredibly good I would drink it by the glassful if offered that way.  My friends tried various dishes including a molcajete bowl which is served in a soup/stew served in a stone bowl.  The entire dinner, appetizers, drinks, entrees, deserts and tip would come to a little over $100 for the four of us.  The same, at the same quality in San Francisco or New York would have easily been $500.

While dinner itself was great, when desert came out we were absolutely blown away. Casa Oaxaca uses local ingredients and southern Mexico offers a wide range of fruits and edible flowers to use in their dishes and deserts.  I ordered a guava tart with rose petals and vanilla ice cream.

oaxaca desert

It was every bit of tasty as it was beautiful.  All of the deserts were magnificent and the whole meal was truly long series of happiness moments.  I leave you with a couple images of our deserts.

 

 

 

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Be productive with your time

Posted on January 25, 2021 by Michael Kane

Be productive with your time

rev kane, slower pace of life, can make you happy

A slower pace of life can make you happy

The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. ~ Bertrand Russell

What is life but time.  We know this inherently when we talk about the things we care about, we always talk about time spent with family or friends.  That time we did something or went somewhere.  Time is also our most precious resource, it is the one thing we cannot manufacture more of.  We know this inherently as well, for people that we love, who we have lost, we often talk about what we would be willing to give for just one more day with them, one more word, one more chance to hold them.

But humans by nature are paradoxical animals and as much as we may inherently know that time is a precious resource we often act as if it isn’t.  We wait, god how we wait before doing things.  We call it procrastination so it doesn’t sound so bad but we do far too much of it.  All of us have waited before letting someone know how we feel, waited before starting that degree or changing jobs or getting out of a bad relationship.  One of the things I do in order to battle against our natural tendency to procrastinate is to remind myself of the very precious nature of time and how fast it can go by.  That reminder often is enough to push me into action.

During the pandemic I found myself just wasting time.  Essentially I would work and then just sit down, relatively mindlessly in front of the television for the rest of the night.  Now, I’m not one of those TV is bad people, I’m a TV watcher.  After the end of the day, when I’ve done all of the things I want and need to do, I thoroughly enjoy watching an hour or two of good quality TV.   It allows me to be entertained, and to relax in a relatively mindless way.  One of my biggest issues is difficulty in slowing my mind down, TV allows me to do that in a way that is satisfying.  So if I’m taking time at the end of the day to watch a quality TV show that’s productively using my time.  When I’m tolerating mediocre TV just to have something to watch, well that’s actually wasting time.  It was this realization and reminding myself about my precious and limited time that snapped me out of my funk and got me moving back to using my time more productively.

So what am I saying, that we should all work like dogs every waking moment of our life?  Absolutely not.  To be very clear what I’m pushing when I say be productive is that I believe we need to be purposeful in how we use our time.  Make sure that the way you use your time accomplishes something that you need.  The obvious things in that are things like taking care of your family, your relationships, building your wealth, your health, doing things that will improve your quality or quantity of work, even your side-hustles.  But relaxation is also something you need, entertainment is also something you need.  So  purposeful relaxation is a productive use of your time.  As the quote above says, time you enjoyed wasting, is not wasted time.  I love this quote, I love the sentiment, I love that within the quote there is this judgement of what wasted time is, but that the quote also says that, that particular judgment doesn’t matter.  Remember, it is you who determines whether or not what you are doing is unproductive or wasted time, not others.

So my friends, find ways to make your time productive even if it’s just to relax.  If you are thoughtful about what you do, you won’t wasted your precious time and you’ll have happier days. ~ Rev Kane

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Building each other up to be happy

Posted on January 24, 2021 by Michael Kane

Building each other up to be happy

hug, happiness, be happyIf you want happiness for an hour, take a nap. If you want happiness for a day, go fishing. If you want happiness for a year, inherit a fortune. If you want happiness for a lifetime, help somebody. ~ Rev Kane

Being around happy people

Happiness is a decision we make for ourselves, but it is certainly easier to be happy if you are around happy people.  The way I best relate this to them is to ask them to think about what it was like when they were a child.  To think back to when they were a child and their parents were fighting, I ask if they remember the way they felt, that knot in their stomach.  I also ask them to think about when their parents were happy and having fun and to think about how they felt then.  It’s the best way I know to illustrate the raw power and impact of being around other happy people.

The importance of being happy

Being happy is a reward on it’s own, but being happy also helps make the people around you happy, whether that is family, friends or coworkers. But what are the specific benefits to you of being happy beyond just feeling better.  From an article about the benefits of being happy, we know several things.  From studies they found that people who are happy have the following benefits related to their happiness.

    • Lower heartrate and blood pressure
    • Strengthens your immune system
    • Combats stress
    • May help you live longer

How to be happy

First, you need to get back to basics

  • Eat right
  • Sleep
  • Exercise
  • Staying hydrated
  • Shelter and safety
  • Human contact (hugs)

I’ve talked about these in more in my post, getting back to basics. The second thing of course is to stretch yourself, to get yourself out of your comfort zone so that you can experience things that will truly help change you.

How you being happy helps others

The first thing I would do is to refer you to the quote above, the surest, fastest way to feel better about yourself is to help others.  So there’s a good formula to helping the people you are around be happy.  First, work on being happy yourself.  Then, find ways to help others by showing kindness.  Studies show that, giving makes you happier because it stimulates the same center of the brain that responds to food and sex.  So you can make your colleagues happier by doing things with or for the people you work with.  This means that things like volunteering with your co-workers is a way to build more happiness in all of you.

Giving small counts

Giving doesn’t have to be something grand, you don’t have to go build a house with Habitat for Humanity or anything that big.  Small acts of kindness and yes, to be cliche, random acts of kindness can have a huge impact on people.   What sorts of things am I talking about?  A simple smile or a hello, a small compliment and for people you know a simple hug, the act of caring human contact has more of an impact than you can imagine.  At work, something a college I worked for did, was to allow people to nominate co-workers for a thank you.  A small group of folks would show up in their office with a small gift and a balloon and just let them know that they are appreciated.  A small but powerful thing.

So, one more reason for being happy is that it helps make the people around you happy too and that will always make for a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

Other posts about how to be happy

Believe in yourself to be happy

Remember the Sweet Things

Overcoming demons to be happy

Fear is killing your happiness

 

 

 

 

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Happiness Resources: Living a Happy and Fulfilled Life

Posted on January 23, 2021 by Michael Kane

Happiness Resources: Living a Happy and Fulfilled Life

Even if you are on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there         ~ Will Rogers

fulfillment

So in today’s tour around the web I went to check out Mind Body Green, a friend recently turned me on to the site and much like some of my other favorites like Zen Habits and the Tiny Buddha it’s chock full of good pieces.  So I sorted through some of the ones that specifically related to living a happy and fulfilled life.  So take a look and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Twelve things you should do every week

Six ways to create your own happiness

Fourteen Mantras To Help You Build Positive Self-Talk

Four steps to stop worrying about what people think about you

Fifteen essential truths for a beautiful life

The one question to ask yourself to live a fulfilling life

Five habits of highly fulfilled people

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Happiness & Hugs

Posted on January 22, 2021 by Michael Kane

Happiness & Hugs

bliss happiness burning man

 

 

 

 


You can’t wrap love in a box, but you can wrap a person in a hug.  ~Author Unknown

Hello friends, I just recently returned from my latest to trip to Burning Man in the Nevada Desert.  I’m still decompressing from the experience and there will be much more to write about and many images to share over the next couple of weeks.  Right now however I’m sliding through the transition phase from the Burning Man world to what burners call the default world.  There’s a natural dip that occurs when you come back into the world and one of the key factors is human contact.

At Burning Man, on the Playa people rarely shake hands when they meet, the custom is to hug.  So during that week in the desert you get far more hugs than normal.  This raises your mood and makes you feel better about yourself and quite frankly humanity in general.  So I’m sitting here tonight writing this piece wishing for a nice big hug to make me feel better and the thing is, if there is someone near you right now, they’re in need of one as well.  So get up and go over there and give them a great big hug and you’ll both feel better and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Related Articles

Post Playa Depresssion

Simplest Formula for Happiness

Happiness is Staying Positive

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It’s the little things

Posted on January 21, 2021 by Michael Kane

It’s the little things

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When you’re traveling in the developed world and particularly in the western world there are a lot if similarities. People are very similar, you might not know the language but very often you know the interaction.  Siblings, friends, parents with children react to each other the same way you are used to seeing them act.

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There are lots of little differences, like there rarely being ice in your glass.  The fact that breakfast is either more food than you can comprehend or just a pastry and coffee.  It’s the little differences like saying wee instead of little.

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One that always hits me is how multilingual people are outside the US. I was in conversation with several people and watched a woman effortlessly switch between, french, english, german and spanish.  The host at the hotel’s breakfast this morning did the same.  It makes me feel incompetent frankly, that I only speak one fluently and 3 at a rudimentary level at best.

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These little differences are one of the things I really love about travel, especially when I get to bring them back to my default life.  Those tend to be new types of foods or phrases but serve as little reminders of my life on the road, have a happy Monday my friends.  – Rev Kane 

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What will be your next moment of joy?

Posted on January 20, 2021 by Michael Kane

What will be your next moment of  joy?

joy quote

I’ve been thinking a lot about joy lately.  Not happiness, but joy, that childlike feeling where you’re so happy in the moment you’re actually giddy and giggling.  Over the last couple of years I’ve experienced a lot of happiness.  Some amazing travel experiences in Scotland, Morocco and Oaxaca.  I landed a good job, have come to a place of acceptance on some personal issues.  Most recently I had the opportunity to trick or treat with my little nephews and meet their four month old little sister.  Holding her for the first time and having her laugh and smile at me in my arms was amazingly special.  But as incredibly special that was, it was not that feeling of joy.  There’s a component of excitement when a situation comes to joy that just isn’t present in the quiet special moments.

I can remember vividly my last moment of pure joy.  It was two years ago in December while traveling in Jordan.  It was my first time ever swimming in the Dead Sea.  I had wanted to do that since I was a young child, and even as a trained scientist and completely understanding the science behind it all, I was amazed.  When I jumped into deeper water and started bobbing around like a cork, I was giddy.  A fifty year-old man giggling like a toddler.  The experience was incredible I was so amazingly happy.  I had expected it to be fun but not like it was, pure joy.

That’s the thing about joy, it can’t wholly be planned for, but what you can do, is put yourself into situations where you might experience it.  As for every post on the Ministry of Happiness, I scanned the web for articles on creating joy.  Unlike most topics however, I was pretty disappointed on how little there is out there that provided good advice about creating joy in your life, so this set me to thinking on how you might do it.

While I don’t think there is anyway to guarantee you will create a moment of joy for yourself, I think there are certainly some factors that can help to lead to moments of joy:

Something new – a new situation, a new place, a new activity the ability to go from not knowing but thinking you like something to having the experience can often be a nice platform to create some joy.  Joy often comes off a moment of surprise.

Something simple – moments of joy often happen in really simple situations, tasting a new food or drink, experiencing a new place, even just jumping  into the Dead Sea.

Having children involve –  children, with their lack of experience in life, experience joy at a much higher level than adults.  So having children around and seeing things through their eyes or even just experiencing their joy with them can often get you there as well.

Low stress environment – you’re highly unlikely to experience joy if you are stressed, traveling under a deadline or are having to be highly structured.

So what will be your next moment of joy my friends?  Or how will you create one for someone else?  I’m in search of my own and trying to build one before the holidays are over.  I’ll keep you posted, drop a comment and let everyone know about yours and as always, have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

 

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Happiness Moments: Floating on the Dead Sea

Posted on January 19, 2021 by Michael Kane

Happiness Moments: Floating on the Dead Sea

If you don’t love the sea, the sun, all the simple pleasures, what sort of life are you going to have? ~ Marty Rubin

I have never been able to float on my back, it was something that used to irk me quite a bit when I was a child.  My sister took to it quite easily but I could never do it.  Then, when I was eight or nine years old, I saw an episode of 60 Minutes on the Dead Sea.  The story was focused on the healing effects of the mud or something, all I really remembered from the story was that they said ANYONE, can float in the Dead Sea.

Now I’m a trained scientist, I get the science, I fully comprehend the concept of buoyancy and that given the conditions in the Dead Sea floating there should be quite easy.  It’s one thing to know something theoretically, it’s another thing to actually experience it.  So on a little bit of a chilly morning I set out down the steps of the resort to the shore of the Dead Sea.  It was in the low 50’s, so a bit chilly but the water was in the high 60’s and quite comfortable.  I stepped into the water walking on the rocks with a pair of reef shoes the bottom is not very pleasant.  I hit the point where the bottom dropped off and as I stepped forward I lost my balance a bit and BAM, my feet kicked up and there I was laying on my back, ON TOP of the water!  I started laughing like a child it was absolutely amazing.

In the Dead Sea you float like a cork, you can literally float upright in a standing position without treading water.  I sat in the water with my legs crossed, floating like I was sitting on a pool noodle.  You’re actually so buoyant that if you tip a little to one side that side pops to the surface.  It was so much fun, had it been just a bit warmer I would have stayed in the water all day.  However, it was a little chilly and I had a head cold, so after a short float I came out of the water.

The Dead Sea is both beautiful and wild and I highly recommend it as an experience you’ll never forget, I know I never will.

The salt formations along the shore and really beautiful.  So my friends, get out, travel and have happy days.  ~ Rev Kane

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