Hiker Slang

Hiker Slang

We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect ~ Anais Nin

At a book club recently for my book, Appalachian Trial Happiness, the readers said they wish there had been a glossary.  I had originally had set one up in the book but in the editing process opted to incorporate the terms and definitions.  So here it is as a companion to the book, and hikers please, add terms to the comments that I’ve left out and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Approach Trail – The Approach Trail is best skipped in my opinion but many people will take the long stair filled stroll up through Amicalola Falls State Park.  Many people refer to it as the hardest seven miles on the trail.  That’s absolutely psychological, you’re nervous, you’re likely carrying too much weight and without a doubt it’s a hell of a climb.

Aqua Blazing, (Pink, Yellow and Brown Blazing, etc…) – there are a huge array of color related slang to describe the way someone is approaching their hike.  I’m sticking to some of the most frequent ones here. Yellow blazing, usually said with derision, refers to hikers who hitch a ride up the trail and skip parts of the trail.  It’s always interesting to know you’re several days ahead of someone on the trail and then catch up to them again, but in my opinion, hike your own hike.  Pink blazing is an interesting phenomenon, sometimes two people meet on the trail, fall madly in love and become inseparable hiking partners, they are said to be pink blazing.  I’ve also heard it used for a hiker who has changed pace to stick with someone they are crushing on.  Brown blazing is usually linked to an outbreak of Norovirus or other stomach malady and refers to someone who is having to frequently get off trail to use the privy or cat holes due to their ailment.  Finally, Aqua blazing refers to traveling through part of the trail by canoeing, kayaking or rafting down a river and rejoining the trail at the end of the run.  This most often occurs in Virginia but there are several places near the trail where this can be accomplished.

Blue Blaze – A Blue Blaze marks a parallel trail related to the AT.  At times they mark the trails to the shelters or water sources but blue blazes have a very different meaning on the trail.  You see some of the blue blaze trails are trails that are set up to skip around some of the gnarlier parts of the trail.  As such, “blue blazing” ends up being a derogatory term in the hiking community really suggesting that this person is not as much of a hiker as those who only follow white blazes.  The attitude is at complete contrast with the professed philosophy of hike your own hike.  As I read once, can’t remember where, an older hiker, defending his “blue blazing” basically admitted without doing that he’d never make Maine.  I’m a firm believer in the hike your own hike mentality, likely due to my focus on the journey instead of the destination and I did a few blue blaze trails over my 1000 miles.  My first was Albert Mountain, I’m a bad descender and while nursing a bad knee, I blue blazed Albert Mountain. On the profile the descent looked particularly gnarly, honestly on the profile the damn thing looked like a finger pointing up to the sky.  Turned out, as I would hear from others, that the descent was actually not bad. However, not knowing that in advance, it was the call I made. I’ll admit there is a bit of shame in this admission and the purists will look down on me.  A reminder that the less one cares about the opinions of others, the happier you will usually be.

Brown Blazing – (See Aqua Blazing)

My longest hiking partner, Second Star

The Bubble – is a very fluid term, it generally refers to the large grouping of hikers during the most popular times on the trail.  Most spring NOBO’s start between March first and April fifteenth, so that group, due to varying pace ends up being a pulse of hikers that pass through areas of the trail and trail towns together over a three week period.  Of course this happens in reverse with SOBO’s and really a bubble can get created anytime a big group of people end up starting around the same time.  Your bubble becomes you’re extended community, familiar faces to see in towns and on the trail.  You trade news, stories and information about fellow hikers you have in common, it creates a wonderful sense of community.

Cat hole – I’ll admit it, maybe this doesn’t make me a super hiker, but I wasn’t excited about the idea of shitting in a hole in the ground.  A cat hole, is the way you should properly execute this activity, you should dig a hole at least six inches deep, deposit your contribution and toilet paper and then mix it in with a stick and refill the hole with the dirt you removed.  Sort of the way your cat is supposed to treat its litter box.  Given the number of privies on the AT, if you stay around the shelters at night you have access to a privy nearly every night on the trail.  Of course there are nights in campgrounds and stealth camping nights and the occasional privy line that is longer than the time you have to wait.  I become completely comfortable with cat holing in the woods.  My preferred technique when possible was to use a fork shaped downed tree as an improvised privy.  It’s amazing on the trail how quickly you can become ok with just plopping your bare ass down on a mossy log in the forest.

Cowboy Camping – This is old school camping, just laying out under the stars on the ground without the benefit of a tent, shelter or hammock.  People do it, a lot of ultralight folks basically do it every night.  This term always leads me to think about another one, the cowboy shower.  A cowboy shower is effectively an exercise in efficiency, you get into the shower, fully dressed and use the shower and soap to first wash your clothes, piece by piece as you remove them and then finally wash yourself.  Hardly a necessary exercise while hiking the trail but apparently happens often enough that one hostel I stayed in had a prohibition against it.  This was a fascinating hostel with a fascinating list of rules, another was no shitting in the shower, I sometimes really worry about my fellow humans.

Default World/Life – The default world is the world off the trail, the world you belong to in your normal life.  In my opinion, it is the overly scripted world of expectations where you are forced to wear too many masks day to day.  It is in direct opposition to the trail where you can be who you truly feel you are inside, all the time.

Double Blaze – I include this particular definition because of the utter confusion it caused me on the trail.  I asked several other hikers, and then tried to devise the answer for myself by assessing what was happening whenever I saw them.  For a long time, after another hiker told me this, I believed that double blazes signified that we were crossing another trail or road.  The reality is, double blazes signify a sharp turn in the trail, at least that’s the official line.  Because I’ll tell you my friends, I’ve seen trails double blazed with the tiniest of direction changes and have been on hair pin changes on the trail that were not double blazed.  All part of the fun and adventures you have walking up the East Coast of America in the woods.

Flip/Flopping and NOBO/SOBO – refer simply to direction while hiking or thru-hiking.  NOBO is a north bound hiker, SOBO is walking south and a Flip/Flop is when you start somewhere in the middle, go North or South to the end and then flip back to where you started and go the other way.  There is lots of discussion over which way is best, all of it is irrelevant, what’s best is what works for you.  I advocate doing a NOBO hike in the spring if you are attempting a thru-hike.  You get the benefit of a much larger community doing it that way, sure, it’s also a bit crowded at the beginning, but the herd thins out mightily before you hit the half-way point.  When I was hiking south in the summer and encountering NOBO’s I’d hiked with early on, they were often a bit desperate to see other hikers if they were on their own.  It really showed me the absolute importance of community on the trail.  I believe, I don’t know for sure, but basic math seems to show that having that level of community is much more difficult for SOBO thru-hikers to find.

Grasshopper rain – No, grasshopper rain is not grasshoppers falling out of the sky.  But in the spring as you’re walking sometimes you hear the sound of water sprinkling down on the leaves.  It sounds just like rain and because you know it isn’t, you freak out a bit thinking it’s a snake or some other critter.  I heard this sound nearly a dozen times before I finally figured out what it was.  Coming down off of Max Patch at the edge of the field I heard the rain sound, but because of the open nature of the ground, I finally saw what was causing it, grasshoppers.  Hordes of little baby grasshoppers who apparently hatched out together in the spring and as you walk up on them they hop away in a tiny wave.  They are small and well camouflaged, so they are hard to see, but you can hear them hopping across the dried leaves, each little hop like a drop of rain landing on the leaves.

Hike your own hike – this is the most common phrase you will hear hiking on the Appalachian Trail.  What it means is that every person has to do the hike in their own way.  Some people will carry 15 pounds of ultralight gear, hike 20 miles a day and never touch a blue blaze.  Some will carry 72 pounds, hike at night and hike 8 miles a day.  Some people spend a lot of money on nice hotels and expensive meals in town, some sleep in hostels or 6 people in a cheap motel room and eat at Taco Bell.  Some people are on the trail to prove something to others, most to prove something to themselves, some are walking off tragedy and war, and some are trying to change their lives.  None of it matters, everyone is walking the same trail, over the same mountains and everyone has to do it their own way and that’s what the phrase means.  Everyone has to hike their own hike in their own way and it’s ok.  The trail isn’t Utopia, there are flawed humans involved, so sometimes people don’t reflect this attitude, but honestly the majority of hikers I met believed in the idea of hike your own hike.

Hiker Midnight – I’m not a morning person, but that becomes irrelevant on the trail.  Much like folks in the past, on the trail you really end up being a sun up to sundown person whether you want to or not.  First, especially in the spring, daylight hours are still short and you’re not up to your prime hiking speed yet.  So miles are hard to come by and you need most of the daylight to get the miles you’d like to get each day.  Yes, in the beginning that was only eight to ten miles a day, but that often took eight to ten hours to accomplish with breaks for lunch, rest, etc… It would not be uncommon to leave camp around eight in the morning and arrive at your final campsite at four.  The sun goes down early that time of year and even earlier when you’re in a bowl between mountains on the AT.  It would not be unusual in March to lose the sun at a particular site before four in the afternoon.  There’s only so much you can really do in the dark, sure a nice fire at the shelter and some conversation is fun but people are planning to be up by five or six in the morning.  So you end up retiring to your tent/hammock usually by six or seven at night.  Thus the term “hiker midnight”, people disagree on the time, but it is typically eight or nine at night, by this time a hiker camp seems like a town at midnight, almost no one moving about and little noise but the snoring of others, animal calls and the dropping of acorns.

Hiker Trash – in a lot of subcultures, the subculture will take a derogatory term coined by the public and co-opt it for themselves.  We are hiker trash, a term that if said in town by non-hikers is not a compliment.  But it has become a term of endearment between hikers, we are proud to be hiker trash.

Mau and Rev Kane

Hiking the Appalachian Trail – This one is not really trail jargon but something that does come up in conversation.  In 2009, South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford slipped off to South America for a little tryst with his mistress.  During his absence one of the explanations for his disappearance by a staff member was that he was out hiking the Appalachian Trail.   So from time to time when you tell someone you’re about to go hike the trail you’ll get a snicker and a question, “what’s her name?”

Nearos & Zeros – We all go into town, especially after a long swing of four or five days on the trail, not much in life beats a huge meal, a hot shower and an actual bed after you’ve been on the trail for awhile.  A nearo is a day where you do nearly zero miles, a little deceptive because it usually means hiking several miles into town and crashing for the night.  Of course you’re resupplying and don’t have a vehicle so you end up walking another couple of miles in town to get supplies, eat, etc… A zero is when you actually spend two nights in town and that second day do very little but rest.  Of course the same issue persists and often when you plan a zero you crash out the night before and spend the zero day walking all over town to do mail, get supplies and to eat, but at least you’re in camp shoes and not carrying much weight on your back.

Pink Blazing – (See Aqua Blazing)

Ponies (Ponieeeeeessss!!!) – the Grayson Highlands are a highlight for a lot of hikers as there are herds of wild ponies that live on that section of the trail.  I will admit, they are pretty cool, except for the horse shit everywhere.  I went through nearly the entire highlands before I saw my first pony.  I came over a small rock climb in the fog and as I hit the trail on the other side of the rocks, I realized I had a pony standing five feet away staring at me.  There was an entire herd right there with me in the fog, as I went for my camera in my pack one decided I must be digging out food and came and shoved his nose in my chest.  It was cool and a little disconcerting.  However the thing that really caught my attention about the ponies was the reaction of most female hikers.  Apparently that cliché little girl dream of owning a pony is strong in the hiker community.  Female hikers, women I would never have expected this from, would squeal in delight at the thought and the sight of ponieeeeeessss!!!  My friend Second Star, chief among them.

Privy – A privy is basically an outhouse, most of them operate off of basic composting principles and are kept up by local volunteers.  That’s right, that’s how amazing some people are, they actually volunteer to take care of outhouses so other people can have a comfortable place to relieve themselves.  Privies on the AT range from the utterly disgusting to some much nicer than you can possible imagine.  In part of Pennsylvannia the shelter keepers do an amazing job, not just keeping them clean but making the attractive.  Fake light switches, hand sanitizer, one even provided toilet paper, basically something unheard of on the trail.

Some are really well constructed, comfortable and in amazing locations, some were obviously built for pygmies in Africa and transported to the AT.  A couple of times they were so small I couldn’t close the door, one was so short on the sides that when you stood up after concluding your business you could say hi to the two female elementary school teachers who set their tent up near the privy.  I’m not complaining, both of those privies were better than squatting on a log.

Some of the privies were actually quite nice, particularly because of the view.  There were a few mornings sitting on the privy and watching the sun coming up was a damn pleasurable experience.  I’ve heard tell, didn’t see it myself, that some are made for making friends.  It is rumored that one privy in Maine is a double seater with a cribbage board between the seats.

Privy etiquette takes a bit of getting used to, each seems to have its own set of rules.  The one at Standing Bear Farm has a little sign you flip down.  The privy is great and even has a Plexiglas window on the door.  I remember that well because a female hiker missed the sign and came right up the stairs to the door, looked at me and being a nice person I of course said, “good morning.”  She blushed every time we crossed paths on the trail for the next couple of months.

Purist – A purist, and almost everyone attempting a thru-hike is a purist when they start, is someone who plans on seeing every white blaze, no blue blazing, no yellow blazing, no aqua blazing.  Taken to the extreme a purist will not miss an inch of the trail being careful to walk right back to the point on the trail where they walked off before starting again.  Very few hikers remain purists too far into a thru-hike attempt.  I compare what happens on the trail to the old boxing adage, everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face. We all start out with grand ideas and a romanticized vision of what the trail will be like.  Most lose those idealized visions once they are slapped with cold, rain, mud, ice, snow, heat, rocks and all manner of challenges that both make hiking the AT a giant pain in the ass as well as the most magnificent challenge you’ll ever undertake.

The Rage – the rage isn’t a widely used term but the concept is something we all experience on the trail.  At some point, I was never really sure what triggered it, I would hike days and nothing would happen and then I’d be out for two days and it would hit.  What is it?  The rage, that crazy insatiable hunger that suddenly overtakes you on the trail.  Given that you are burning four to six thousand calories a day and most days eating two to three thousand at best, you are always in a calorie deficit on the trail.  At some point your body has to recoup those calories, usually those are called town days.  In town I’ve seen some impressive feats of eating, my buddy Shaggy crushed an eighteen ounce hiker burger in Hot Springs, my friend Awesome crushed five Big Mac, fries and a two-liter coke on a town day.  Full pizzas per person, followed by desert and a milkshake was not uncommon. When the rage hits on the trail you turn into a bottomless pit, an eating machine.  In the Shenandoah National Park when the rage hit I ate over ten thousand calories in thirty-six hours, much to the horror of a section hiker who had recently started hiking with us.  The only reason I didn’t eat more that day was that I needed to leave some food for the next day or I’d be out of food, I was still very hungry when I went to bed.

Ridge Runner – I met about a half a dozen ridge runners on my hike.  For the most part they were really cool and helpful folks.  They are people who are usually being paid to hike along the trail, help out hikers and report any issues to the appropriate folks regarding wildlife, trail maintenance etc… They also in some areas have responsibility for enforcing shelter stay rules.

Safety Meeting – I was introduced to the concept of the safety meeting in the summer of 2004 at the Burning Man festival in the Nevada Desert.  One of my campmates was walking around one morning letting folks know there would be a safety meeting in ten minutes behind his trailer.  Now, we had a pretty organized camp but a safety meeting, really, what were we, affiliated with OSHA?  One of my other campmates saw the confusion on my face, laughed and asked me if I smoked pot.  Didn’t take me too long after that to connect the dots, especially when she returned a little while later relaxed and glassy eyed.

Section Hiker – as opposed to doing a thru-hike, section hikers are folks who are doing the full Appalachian Trail, one section at a time.  A section can be, 40 miles or in the case of LASHERS and BASHERS (Long-ASS, or Big-Ass Section Hikers) people doing hundreds of miles in a single swipe.  These folks have my absolute admiration, taking years and sometimes decades to complete the entire trail shows a level of dedication I have a hard time imagining.  In talking with them, they confirmed my initial thoughts, that usually about the time they got fully into hiking shape it’s time to go home.

Slack Packing – This is probably the one term I get asked about the most when I use it around non-hikers.  Slack packing is very simply hiking with a day pack instead of your full pack.  This can happen in a variety of ways but typically you’ll pay a hostel owner to drive you up the road some set of miles and then hike back to the hostel with only a day pack on, either with your own pack nearly empty or sometime hostels have day packs that you can borrow.  It’s a nice break from carrying a full pack and you can move really fast and cover a lot of miles on those days.  The next day the hostel owner drops you off at the same point and you continue on up the trail from that point.  I did a lot of slack packing due to my injury, I slack packed back to Mountain Harbour B&B the day after I first hurt my knee.  A side note, Mountain Harbour B&B has the most incredibly breakfast buffet you will ever sample.  I also did a lot of slack packing while rehabbing my knees in NY with my family.  I slacked all of Massachusetts during that time. But by far my luckiest bit of slack packing was due to my friend Backtrack who returned to the trail with an RV for the sole reason of slackpacking some of his fellow hikers.

Thru-hike – A thru-hike is most easily defined as walking the entire length of the Appalachian Trail in one relatively continuous time period.  Of course, as with anything it gets more complicated than that.  To get your certificate of completion from the Appalachian Trail Conservancy (ATC), you are supposed to have walked the entire length of the trail (except in cases of extreme danger, weather, fire, etc…).  The ATC doesn’t care how long this took and once you’ve completed it you get a 2000 miler certificate.  Within the hiking community you will hear all manner of twists and variation on this idea.  Some will tell you as long as you’ve done 2000 miles and gone end to end that’s good enough.  Others will tell you for a “thru-hike” it has to be completed in 12 months.  I’m sure there are variations I’m not aware of and honestly I never cared.  If you walk this trail from end to end, in any order, over any amount of time you’re amazing.  Personally I think the continuous time piece needs to be there to be consider a thru-hiker, but it’s a semantic game and my thought has always been let people call themselves whatever they want, your accomplishments are your own, hike your own hike.

Trail Angels and Trail Magic – I often talk about trail community, that community extends well beyond the folks who are actually on the trail hiking.  The towns along the trail, the hostel owners, the outfitters and of course the Trail Angels.  Trail Angels are folks who help hikers by providing trail magic.  I was more cynical of humanity when I went out on the trail than I am now.  I have the kindness of trail angels to thank for that change in me.  Trail angels offer trail magic in the form of free rides, free food, and in some instances even free places to stay or any other small kindness that a hiker needs.  They are truly angels, there isn’t a much better feeling than turning a corner on a hot day and seeing a cooler sitting next to the trail, opening the lid and finding cold drinks and snacks.

Trail Candy/Vitamin I – Ibuprofen, a hiker’s best friend, I almost shouldn’t admit how much trail candy I gobbled down on the trail, particularly after my knee injury.  But trail candy is a necessary evil when you’re beating on your body for hours and hours every day, day after day walking over mountains with weight on your back for months at a time.  I became particularly fond of the various ibuprofen PM mixtures that give you a little spike of anti-histamine to get you just drowsy enough to slip into sleep at night.

Trail Name – One of the first things anyone talks about with AT hikers is your trail name?  Sometimes people come to the trail with a trail name, this was the case with me.  Although given my resemblance to him, I really wanted to go with Yukon Cornelius but instead went with Reverend Kane, which became Rev Kane on the trail.  I did this for reasons of continuity with my work with the Ministry of Happiness.  A lot of people get their trail name on the trail due to things that happen on the trail.  There are a lot of people named backtrack for obvious reasons, fall down a hill and land in a burst of dirt and dust and voila, you look like Pig Pen from the Peanuts.  Sometimes you get renamed mid-hike whether you want to or not.  I met a hiker in the Shenandoah National Park, who kept getting caught in the vortex of places with comfortable seating and inexpensive, cold beer.  I renamed him Vortex  but the name didn’t stick.  Trail names are important though as it allows both the ability to communicate and be located on the trail but also allows you to remain relatively anonymous and separated from your life back in the default world.

Triple Crowner – These are the kings and queens of the hiking world.  The Triple Crown is thru-hiking the Appalachian (AT), Pacific Crest (PCT) and Continental Divide (CDT) Trails in the United States.  The AT is roughly 2190 miles, the PCT is roughly 2660 and the CDT is roughly 3100 miles long, so that’s 7950 miles to have hiked all three.  That of course doesn’t include the extra miles to camp sites, resupplies, interesting diversions and training hikes.  I’ve met a few triple crowners, they have a tendency to be very modest about the achievement and they are truly the hiking elite, and hell to keep up with on the trail as well.

Vortex – A vortex on the trail is someplace that has the tendency to suck hikers in and delay, and in some case permanently grab a hiker and keep him/her off of the trail.  There are a number of towns on the trail that have a reputation for this, Hot Springs, NC and Damascus, VA among some of the early ones.  In the Shenandoah National Park the waysides in the park, full of hot food, cold drinks and comfortable seating can have this effect.  However, I’ve met folks at hostels who walked in one year and didn’t leave for five years, folks who do work for stay and remain in place for a few days, a week or a season.  The lure of comfort and trail community off the trail can be dangerous combinations to thru-hiking ambitions.

White Blaze – The simplest definition is the mark that is used to indicate the path of the Appalachian Trail.  But White Blazes become so much more than that, they come to symbolize the freedom and dream of hiking the Appalachian Trail.  They guide our way and become a symbol of trail life.  The amazing thing to me is how the search image for White Blazes becomes such a priority in your brain even after being on the trail for a time.  I’ve spotted blazes on the sides of roads that I have driven my whole life and never realized crossed the trail.  White Blazes also become comfort during those times on the trail when you suddenly think your lost, one little white rectangle and you’re relieved and happy again.

Widow maker – A widow maker is a broken or dead branch or a dead tree that has the potential to come down and injure or kill a hiker.  Heading out on my thru-hike attempt widow makers and lightning strikes were my two biggest fears.  This is a very real risk on the trail, in May of 2015 a hiker was killed by a falling tree in a Maryland campground.  I took this risk very seriously, there were nights that I noticed a widow maker after setting up my hammock and had to take down and redo my entire set up.  Early in the trip, in the first campground in the Smoky Mountain National Park, during a particularly violent thunderstorm, I hear a sound I couldn’t identify between the sounds of the rain and thunder.  When I got up in the morning I quickly saw what the noise was, a 40 foot tree had been uprooted and fallen right in the middle of the campground.  Amazingly, it fell in between the two bear cable set ups and away from some other campers, landing about 15 feet from my set up.  Between the storm and aggressive bear warnings signs, that was one of the more sleepless nights on the trail.  The campground would later be closed due to the aggressive bear situation.

Wind Rain – Rain sucks on the trail, you get used to it, it’s a welcome break in the hot months but getting wet sucks.  Given that most of us are wearing trail runners and not waterproof boots our feet get really wet and I really hate wet socks.  This, I knew well before I started my thru-hike attempt but on my hike a coined a new term for a particular condition.  Imagine, you slept through a rainy night, you’re excited in the morning because the rain has stopped.  Great, I won’t need rain gear today and it’s cooled off, a great morning for a hike.  As you’re walking a wind gust comes up and bam, you’re wet.  Now you’re not soaked but wind rain is the water that is on the leaves of trees after a storm that gets brought down in wind gusts.  No matter how well you know this, it always catches you by surprise, nothing like ice cold drops of water dropping down the back of your neck on a chilly AT morning.

Yellow Blazing – (See Aqua Blazing)

Yogi-ing – Is a particular skill that most hikers develop on the trail.  It’s the ability to be both utterly fascinating and utterly pathetic to the general public.  You’re hope, and this really works best in state and national parks, is to spike people’s fascination with what you’re doing and engender enough sympathy that they pass on a little food, drink or a ride in return for your stories.  The concept comes from the old Yogi the Bear cartoons, Yogi was always in search of a lovely picnic basket purloined from the tourists in Jellystone National Park

Zeros and Nearos – (See Nearos)

Rev Kane on his arrival at Amicalola Falls State Park

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Appalachian Trail Happiness: Reader’s Favorite Posts

Quitting the Appalachian Trail

My Favorite Appalachian Trail Photos of 2015

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments

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How to survive the first few days on the Appalachian Trail

How to survive the first few days on the Appalachian Trail

Rev Kane on his first day on the Appalachian Trail

Great works are performed not by strength but perseverance ~ Samuel Johnson

Hiking the Appalachian Trail

Thirty-two miles, that’s it, thirty-two miles.

One of the things my friend Second Star used to do at camp at night was pull out her guide and take a look at where she was “supposed” to be that day.  You see she’d taken AWOL’s guide (a really necessary part of doing the AT), and had planned out every night all the way to Maine.  So we’d pull out the guide and see where she was supposed to be and then laugh at her naivete.  She wasn’t alone.  I remember before I hiked the AT in 2015 being amazed that people only averaged around 10 miles a day.  My thought went something like this, in the spring you have 10 hours of daylight every day.  If you only hike two miles an hour and six hours per day you’ll do 12 miles a day in the beginning.  By June, you’ll have 14 hours per day of daylight, walk 8 miles a day at 2 miles an hour and you’ll cover 16 miles a day.  Sounds easy right and makes that 10 mile per day average seem utterly ridiculous. The reality sets in.

Warner Hill, Appalachian Trail, happiness

Warner Hill

Although I had not done a long-distance unsupported hike before, I had done a supported 22 days in the high passes of the Himalayas.  So 3000 foot mountains in Georgia, piece of cake right?  Oh, so, so wrong.  You see there are a lot of things you’re not thinking about before your first thru-hike attempt.  First, you are certainly carrying too much weight.  My first day on the AT I was humping a 42 pound pack once I was full up on food and water. After I left Mountain Crossings (32 miles in) I was carrying about 36 pounds, that would transition to 32 pounds a few weeks later, and 28 pounds once I was able to go to my lightest sleeping bag.

hiking, happiness, appalachian trail

Overmountain Shelter on the Appalachian Trail

The second issue you’re facing is that you’re nervous as hell.  In the first few weeks on the trail you are nervous as shit.  You feel like everyone else knows more than you do.  I know I felt like an utter newbie on the trail and then a couple of nights in when I set down in my hammock I did a complete backflip and landed on my ass infront of the entire campsite.  What I would find out as the weeks went on were a couple of things.  First, a lot of other newbies felt exactly the same way I did and a couple of them even thought I was this super experienced hiker and we all had a good laugh.  Second, there really are some super professional hikers on the trail.  Some hikers I got to know were doing the AT for their second or third time and by that I mean completers.  Some were hiking the AT for their fourth or fifth time, so they were super experienced.  Some were triple crowners (had completed the AT, PCT and CDT) others had done at least the PCT.  So the nerves you’re experiencing add to the stress, tire you out and generally make things harder.  Also you are still learning, in the beginning setting up and taking down camp takes far longer than it should.  You’re not completely organized yet, you have too much shit and so finding your stove, the food you want etc…takes a little bit too long.  The good news of course is that all of that gets better as you move forward.

The third issue is the weather.  For me it rained, sleeted or snowed 12 of my first 14 days.  You will be wet, you will be cold and hell you might be dealing with ice and snow in the early days.  Walking wet is uncomfortable, hell let’s be honest, it sucks.  But you get used to it.

Appalachian Trail, hiking, happiness

White Blazes make me happy

The fourth issue is that you are not in hiking shape yet.  I’m sure some people, a very small number, hit the AT in great hiking shape.  However the most of us are not ready to walk 3-5 days, take a break rinse and repeat without being beat up and sore.  You get there, but most of us just aren’t there in the first few days.

The final issue is that the hills of Georgia suck.  Yes, they are only 3000 foot mountains, but they are wet, cold, rocky, muddy and full of roots, hell, some are just giant rock piles.  You slip a lot, you trip, you twist your ankle and you fall.  I did a full on cartoon wipeout, both feet in the air right on my back.  Then like a flipped over turtle I had to try and get up and that I’m thankful no one video taped it.  The hills of Georgia are also steep, short, but steep and like I said earlier you’re not in great hiking shape yet.

So given all of that, the 8 miles a day I was averaging in Georgia left me leaving camp at first light, and entering camp just before dark.  It also left me exhausted but also thrilled.  As hard as those first days were they were awesome, I was happy and free.  The first time I walked into camp and someone yelled, “hey Rev” I was elated and felt like I was home.

So how do you make those first 32 miles?

How do you make those first 32 miles on the Appalachian Trail.  It’s said that 30% of the people quit at the end of those 32 miles.  But how do you even get through those first 32 miles given the issues I listed above.

First, you have to take the advice that Zach Davis puts forth in his book Appalachian Trials. You have to remember that the majority of the people that quit the trail do so for psychological not physical reasons.  So you have to keep your head in the game.  You have to remember why you decided to the hike the trail in the first place.  You have to remember and truly come to believe that the smiles are more important than the miles.  You have to focus on enjoying yourself and not get hung up on your schedule or where you are supposed to be.  This is possibly a once in a lifetime adventure, treat it that way, every single day on the trail can be amazing if you look at it that way.

Appalachian Trail, hiking, happiness

A magical spot on the Appalachian Trail

Another strategy is to change the way you journal.  I came up with this prior to my hike and that is to journal using three questions each day.  What was the most beautiful thing I saw today? What did I learn today?  What made me happy today?  The beauty of this is that no matter how hard the day might of been for you, you keep your mind focused on the positive.  Each day you spend your time looking for beautiful things, things you’ve learned and what made you happy.  I know this technique got me through my hardest early days.

You also have to focus on what you can change.  You can’t change the weather or the mountains. But you can address the rest.  So get rid of some of that weight and then once you do, get rid of some more, you’ll be so happy you did.  One place where I carried too much was redundancy.  I have absolutely no idea why I was carrying two lighters when I had a self-lighting stove.  Get rid of shit you don’t absolutely need!

Prepare and set your expectations appropriately.  Don’t expect to do more than 8 miles a day and if you do 6 but you had a good day, so be it.  If you have time before your hike, get into better shape, that means more time on trails with a full pack on your back.  If you can’t, hit the gym as hard as you possibly can. And get your head around that you will be cold and wet but that it will get better.

Finally my friends, you can do it, I believe in you!  Other people believe in you, if it’s getting rough reach out, call them, email me or talk to your fellow hikers, you’re all going through the same thing.  If not, it’s likely a super hiker who has ton of useful information or maybe a spare sleeve of cookies.  And remember as always, to have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

be happy, hiking, appalachian trail, tennessee

Rev Kane on the Appalachian Trail at the Tennessee border.

Other Appalachian Trail Hiking Information

Thru-hiking food recommendations and recipes

Appalachian Trail Hiking resources

Appalachian Trail Happiness acceptance is the way

Quitting the Appalachian Trail

 

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Happiness is a Little Adventure

Happiness is a Little Adventure

Rev Kane in the Antelope Poppy Reserve

 We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open. ~ Jawaharial Nehru

I have talked about it many times on this blog and in my book, Appalachian Trail Happiness.  I firmly believe that happiness comes through change and the best way to create change is through travel and adventure.  Now I have written many times before about some of my bigger adventures, Hiking the Appalachian Trail, Photographing Polar Bears in Canada, Hiking to Base Camp on Mt. Everest or traveling to Petra in Jordan.  I understand that those types of large-scale adventures are not always possible for any of us.  But I don’t believe that you need to do a large-scale adventure to make change, that a small adventure is enough.

Mt. Unaka on the Appalachian Trail

As I’ve written about in the last few weeks I’ve been a bit out of sorts.  I’ve felt like I haven’t been making progress toward my larger goals.  I have been, there was plenty of evidence to show me that but sometimes, regardless of evidence to the contrary, you just feel stuck.  A lot of it has to do with my lack of patience, something I still need to work on.  Although I have a bigger adventure coming up in a couple of weeks, I needed something.

Mojave Desert in full bloom

So with the desert in full bloom I decided to take a dawn trip to the Antelope Valley Poppy Reserve in Lancaster, CA.  After an early breakfast I got to the reserve around 7AM.  I was happy to get in early on a Friday morning, by time I left four hours later there were cars lined up all the way to the entrance and the parking lots were quickly filling.  There are about eight miles of trails in the reserve and I think I covered all of them, unfortunately without my knee brace on.  But a little knee pain was absolutely worth it for the magnificent beauty that I experienced in the reserve.  I’ve posted some photos and a couple of videos on my Instagram feed at @reverendmichaelkane.  And for your viewing pleasure here are some of the photos I took, including a biplane that came flying over as I was leaving the reserve.

Have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

 

 

 

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Are You Happy?

Are You Happy?

me drink“You have one job, to lead an extraordinary life.”  I’ve seen this quote attributed to a number of people, I’ve also seen it in several different forms so I’m not quite sure who to appropriately attribute it to, but I love it.  It’s my philosophy of life.

Now I’ve had plenty of people, when I bring this idea up, that start immediately writing it off and pointing out that without kids, or a wife I am more free than they are, so I can think this way and they can’t.  They my friends, are wrong, I consider it a lack of imagination.  I know what I’m talking about, I’ve seen it.  What is it?  Well in my journeys and on my adventures I’ve seen every type of human in every relational configuration out doing the same things I have done.  You see we all have responsibilities, we all have limitations but the limit that holds us back to the most is our own brain.  Whether it is buying into society’s script or our own limited imaginations, we are in control of our lives. We decide what we can achieve and how happy we can be.

The Eagles said it best, from Already Gone, “so often times it happens, we live our lives in chains, and we never even know we have the key.”

I didn’t always know this my friends, I wasn’t born with this insight, nor was I always as happy as I am today.  It took a long time to learn this idea, not intellectually but in my heart, it took time to internalize the concept.  I had to have to experience to truly believe that the more I stretched myself, the more adventures I went on, the more I followed my own script,  the happier I became.  So be yourself, love yourself, stretch yourself, take the road less followed and you might just find more happiness.  So tonight’s main point, a simple question.

Are you happy my friends?  No, not that quick nod, stop for a minute, sit back in your chair and really think about it, are you really happy?  If not, what would make you happy, if you are, what would make you even happier?  That’s the goal, those things, whatever they are, are the items for your bucket list.  But not for off in some distant future,  soon for those items that need planning and resources, NOW for the easy ones.  Even if it seems a little crazy, bring your kids, bring your parents, be a little crazy as the old commercial used to say, try it, you’ll like it.  You might just find a smile you haven’t seen in a while, you might become a bit happier than you are right now, you might even change your life and have many happy days my friends ~ Rev Kane

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happiness and the Benefits of Gratitude

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Happiness is a Choice

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Happiness is Independence

Happiness is Independence

flyI ask only to be free.  The butterflies are free. ~ Charles Dickens

I thought, given today is Independence Day in the United States, I would write about being free.  If you read this blog you know that I’ve recently gone back to work after an 18 month vacation.  The comment I get from folks when they first hear about that is, lucky you.  But it’s not luck.  Once I say that the conversation often turns to the fact that I’m not married.  There is some merit to that discussion but it’s not really about me not being married, what it is about is me being less encumbered than they are in life and that’s a choice.

Often times, we believe that the reason we can’t do the things we want in life, the things we dream about doing, is that we have all of these things holding us back that we can’t do anything about.  Of course what we often forget is that we placed most of the chains that hold us down on ourselves.  There are few obligations that we have in life that we didn’t place on ourselves.  Marriage, kids, a mortgage payment these are all choices we make in life.  Where we live, how we live, what job we have are all choices we made.

Sometimes it seems like these aren’t choices at all, society’s expectations, love, the fear of being alone leads to marriage.  We have kids because we want to, because our partner wants to, because our parents want grandchildren, for the survival of the species, because it’s what’s next.

The reasons are somewhat irrelevant, we love our partners, we love our children, we do our best to be good people.  We do what we think is right often without a thought to the consequences down the road.  We’re human, imperfect and that’s ok.

The message I want to send in this piece my friends is that no matter where you are now, those dreams you have are not out of reach.  This is not a theoretical proposition, during my travels over the last couple of years I encountered people at every level of their lives chasing their dreams.  I met retired folks following society’s script, people who dutifully waited until they had retired before they chased their own dreams.  I also met people who waited with their partner’s for that day, only to have their partners die before they could enjoy their time together.  I met families with young children chasing their dreams together.  I met husbands and wives pursuing their dreams with supportive families at home.  What I’ve learned in the last couple of years is that the old adage, where there’s a will there’s a way is true.

You can do it, you can chase and achieve your dreams, you just have to increase your level of freedom.  How do I do that you ask, when I have bills to pay and people who depend on me?  There are a few steps  The first, the biggest and absolutely the hardest is that you have to decide to do it, to commit to following your dream.  Whatever IT is.  Once you have decided that you will do it, the rest is logistics.  Planning is the obvious second step, along with a healthy dose of patience.  Reality does get in the way, initially you may not be able to fully accomplish your dream but you can make steps towards it that can make you happier.

For me, my dream is to be a full-time writer and traveler.  I may not have a wife and kids but I do have people who depend upon me, people I feel obligated to be there for when things are tough.  I’ve also encumbered myself with my choices in life.  I have significant student loan debt, my possessions are an issue, without a wife or children, I’m basically on my own in retirement.  All of these things create obstacles to me just walking away from my current life and becoming what I want to be.

So I’ve committed to getting there and I’ve started planning.  Several years ago when the housing market crashed I bought a house, turned it around and sold it when the market came back.  It paid for my 18 months vacation, what that time was, besides absolutely wonderful, was a test run.  The process of stepping into a completely new life was complicated.  How to you cover your monthly bills?  How do you keep health insurance?  What do you do with all of your possessions?  Learning how to do all of that was a vital step toward reaching my dream.  I’m finishing up editing the book I wrote about my time traveling, another learning process.

I wish I was closer to my dream, I’m still years from getting there, but I know I can now.  It’s not a theoretical construct anymore, it’s a process that has steps.  Currently, working again is actually one of the steps, coming back to California and working keeps me in the retirement system, that pension is a piece of what I’ll need to put together to make my dream workout.  I’m also taking other steps, getting my debt taken care of, and reducing the amount of my possessions.  If you are traveling you have to store your stuff, the less you have the cheaper it is to store things.  I once read that if a possession isn’t something you frequently use, or adds to the beauty in your life, it’s not worth keeping.  I’m currently employing that filter.

I relate these personal details to show you that you can do it, you can pursue and achieve your dreams, you can make them real.  Your circumstances are not mine, the things that you need to overcome will be different, maybe harder, maybe easier but you can make them happen.  We live once, this isn’t a practice run, make your dreams happen or they never do, that’s just the way it is.  This is why I write this blog, I want you to be happier, I want you to fulfill your dreams.  If one of you reading this take these steps, gets closer to your dreams because of these words, then I’ve succeeded and my days and yours are that much happier my friend. ~ Rev Kane

Some Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Our Best Happiness Posts for 2015

Revisiting Some of Our Best Posts & Pictures

Readers Favorite Appalachian Trail Posts

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Resources to Boost Your Mood

Resources to Boost Your Mood

01
At first, I only laughed at myself. Then I noticed that life itself is amusing. I’ve been in a generally good mood ever since.  ~ Marilyn vos Savant

The holidays are a very stressful time for everyone and an exceptionally hard time for some.  So, until the New Year I’ll be posting a Holiday Happiness post each day to try help folks out who are struggling.  As always you can reach out to me at Happinesskane@aol.com for a kind word or someone to listen. ~ Rev Kane

Sometimes this time of year we just feel blah.  For me, I know what my triggers are and they include lack of sleep, lack of exercise and lack of sun.  So when I start getting into a blah mood these are the first things I look at.  We all have our own triggers, although bad or lack of sleep seems to be a fairly universal one.  For Christmas this year I purposefully put myself at a beach house in Florida for the weekend, this allowed me to sleep, to walk the beach, get lots of sun and watch waves.  It’s important to identify your own triggers in order to keep them from tanking your mood.  Unfortunately we can’t always get to a beach house for the weekend, so tonight some resources to help you boost your mood.  Enjoy and have a happier day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Ten tips from WebMD to get your day started with Ten Morning Mood Busters

From Everyday Health, a set of 8 tips for boosting your mood during the day.

From Mind Body Green, some General Tips on Increasing Your Mood.

Finally from WebMD, food and drinks to help your mood.

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Our Best Posts of 2015

Life is Hard, But We Keep Moving

Holiday Happiness: Overcoming Worry

Happy Christmas? Thoughts on the Holiday Season

Holiday Happiness: Family, Friends & Environment

Holiday Happiness: Funny Holiday Stories

Holiday Happiness: Resources for Fighting Depression

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Happiness is Rain in the Desert

Happiness is Rain in the Desert

rainI love the rain, I always have, some of my best memories from childhood are sitting on my front porch in the summer while it rained like a fire hose.  It was always amazing right after the rain would finish, the most amazing smell would rise.  I loved it, it’s a sensory memory that triggers the most amazing feelings in me.

I live in the desert now, and for the first time since I’ve lived here, today there were little patches of rain this morning.  The smell after rain here is completely different, there was actually a smoky character to the air.  It was no less pleasant of a smell, but it was incredibly different than the one from childhood, but it took my brain back to those days, those less complicated and simple days, where I had the time and the inclination just to hang around for the smell rain.  Have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happiness and the Benefits of Gratitude

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Happiness is a Choice

Writing Away the Darkness

 

 

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Happiness is Poetry: d.a. levy

Happiness is Poetry: d.a. levy

poetry, happiness, d.a. levy

d.a. levy

If you want a revolution, return to your childhood and kick out the bottom. ~ d.a. levy

Like a lot of poets I read, I first encountered D.A. Levy in the American Bible of Outlaw Poetry a book I consider to be the best collection of American poetry.  Levy was from Cleveland a Buddhist Jew, who wanted to read everything and write everything.  He was someone who always seemed to be searching for something and I think that’s one of the reasons I identify and enjoy his work.  He also saw the need for change in society, I wonder what he would think of America today.  Here are a few of his pieces, enjoy, and have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

Sitting on a bench near TSquare

                                       (for David Meltzer)

1.

through the branches of
the thin trees of tenth street
the blue sky waits
with me &
im waiting for god
(on a white horse)
to ride thru the
branches of
the lower east side
before returning to
cleveland
& something
tells me
he isnt coming

2.

im a levy of the levites
yet in cleveland
i have painted myself
celtic-blue
& am feeling
something like an outlaw

the druids give me soup
& think im a lama

its been close to 7 years
ive been looking for god
& the trails wearing as
thin as the trees on tenth street

i am a levy of the levites
& last week
a fanatic jew in the heights
called me a halfbreed
because my mother was a christian

i am a levy of the levites
& last week a rabbi
thought i was kidding
when i told him
i was interested in judaism

god i think yr sense
of humor is sad
& perhaps you are also
feeling something
like an outlaw

god i am wondering
for how many years
have the jews
exiled you
while they busied themselves
with survival

 

for a rainy day

kisses
we tried to save
pressed in books
like flowers from
a sun warmed day
only
years later to
open yellowing pages
to find those same
kisses – wilted and dry.

 

Suburban Monastery Death Poem

PART ZERO – Celebration With Rada Drums

only ten blocks away
buildings burned – perhaps burning now
the august night broken by sniper fire
police men bleeding in the streets
a sniper surrenders (perhaps out of ammunition)
Gun Jammed?
someone sed he was framed in a doorway
like a picture – his hands in the air
when they shot him –

only ten blocks away
from my quiet apartment
with its green ceramic buddhas
& science fiction books
unread skin magazines to be cut up
for collages

only ten blocks away
from my total helplessness
from my boredom enforced by the state
they are looting stores
trying to get televisions
so they can watch the riots
on the 11 pm news

the national guard jeeps patrol
the streets again
the army-green trucks with the
giant white star on the side
moving in the summer lightning

i cd tell you partly
why it happened
but you wouldnt believe me

like in Milwaukee
during a reading
just after i said
“this is a paranoid poem – written when i was
experimenting with paranoid states of consciousness,
but im not there anymore”
& a young girl sat writing
“shows paranoid symptoms”
probably for her psychology class
not hearing me at all

i cld try to tell you
about the hopeless despair
ingrained in ghetto walls
& police brutality or police stupidity
or police reality is more than just words
to define situation
by students looking for a cause.
the situations exist & continue
quietly in the dark while the
protest goes on in daylight –
both unheard.

Really
the police try to protect
the banks – and everything else
is secondary

during the riots
i watched the news
& didnt pick sides for a change

i just sat wondering about all
the living room revolutionaries
safe in the suburbs
who cheered everytime someone
was shot or a building went up
in smoke

ten blocks away
it was real
thousands of tourists
arrived

More poems and poetry!

Doug Draime

Warsan Shire

Hosho McCreesh

Charles Bukowski

Ashe Vernon

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Reasonable Happiness

Reasonable Happiness

me drinkIt is not how much we have, but how much we enjoy, that makes happiness.   ~ Charles Spurgeon

The concept of the pursuit of happiness is obviously a very old idea, hell it’s written into the Declaration of Independence.  Over the last decade there has been a lot written about happiness.  Take it from a guy who writes a blog on the subject there are many books, many blogs and workshops out there to help people be happier.  Recently I’ve started seeing a bit of backlash against the idea.  Pieces with titles like, Is the Pursuit of Happiness Making us Miserable?

I get it, I really do, people are sick of hearing about how being mindful, or taking Yoga, or creating six new habits will all make you instantly happy.  I try not to do that with this blog, provide you with instant cures to make you happy,  I do my best to point out that anything worthwhile takes work and that the goal is continuous improvement, getting incrementally happier, not instant happiness.

That said, I do believe pursuing the idea of getting happier is a worthwhile goal.  Working toward becoming a happier person has in fact made me a happier person so I know it can be accomplished.  It probably does not need to be said but there are no easy answers to anything, especially not where humans are concerned.

So my hope for you my friends is to take it slow, make progress but don’t give up on the idea of becoming happier and as always, have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

Some Other Posts You Might Enjoy!

Happiness is a Choice

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Our Best Happiness Posts for 2015

Revisiting Some of Our Best Posts & Pictures

Readers Favorite Appalachian Trail Posts

 

 

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Happy Anniversary: Appalachian Trail Happiness

Happy Anniversary: Appalachian Trail Happiness

Appalachian Trail, Happiness, hikinig

Appalachian Trail Happiness

Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing about. ~ Rev Kane

So one year ago today I did something I’ve always wanted to do and I published a book.  I’m really proud of the book, it is for sale on Amazon as either paperback or Kindle.   It’s been well received and has 23 positive reviews.  Here is a little taste of what people are saying about the book:

If you have thoughts about hiking the trail, or any overnight backpacking this is a great read. It reminds us we’re all human and details the reality of the experience, good and bad. Most importantly, it enlightens into the real reason people do this…for happiness…to learn about themselves, and to adventure. And along the way, you encounter people just like you or not anything like you and you make friends for a lifetime. This book takes you along and leaves you feeling good and wanting to get out there yourself.

And;

Simply stated – buy this book. It’s a great read where the author makes you feel everything he’s feeling and puts it into a conversational tone. It’s filled with humor and adoration for his trail family and incredible gratitude for every intertwined event the universe laid before him then and now. Adventure On!….and keep writing!!

I’m grateful for the reviews and for all of you who have bought the book, thank you!!

Hard to believe it’s been a year already and my next book, a book of poetry is soon to be published, stay tuned. ~ Rev Kane

Some posts about the Appalachian Trail!

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Precious Moments

Happiness, the minimalist mind and hiking the Appalachian Trail

On Hiking Alone

Appalachian Trail Happiness: Acceptance is the Way

Appalachian Trail Happiness: My Best & Readers’ Favorite Posts

 

 

 

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