Pushing Positivity

Pushing Positivity

Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative  stress  into a positive one.  ~ Hans Seyle

Originally posted April, 2019

Well, a lot has been going on in terms of the job search.  I’ve had several interviews and I have several more scheduled.  I’m hopeful to have an offer soon, but things don’t seem to be moving forward so maybe I missed on the first  job, maybe it’s just moving slowly and likely I’m over thinking the whole process.  You see that’s the problem with job hunting, I have very little control.  I’m someone who is quite fond of control, I feel responsible for my own actions and can be that way because I usually have a great deal of control, as we all do, over what happens in my life.  This is one area however that I have almost none and it has me in limbo land.

As someone fond of control, limbo land is a really terrible and stressful place to be.  You see as this process slowly winds forward and I can’t travel or take off to do fun stuff.  So, I’m sort of stuck hanging out and waiting.  Don’t get me wrong I’m staying productive, I read every day, write almost every day, I study Spanish religiously every day and work out most days.  I’ve also been using my time to catch up with old friends, in fact, dropped a couple of notes on friends I haven’t talked to in over 30 years and was excited to hear back from both.

I’ve also been living in a decent size American city for the first time in a long time and frankly traffic is driving me nuts.  People drive like lunatics and turn into rage monkeys sometimes for purely mysterious reasons, sometimes it’s more obvious.  Usually, I handle all of this pretty well and don’t engage but I have to admit totally and honestly, justifiably losing my cool once last week.  Although I feel it was justified it bothered me that I engaged and so since then I’ve really been trying to push positivity.

What do I mean by pushing positivity?  Just what it sounds like, trying to be overly friendly, kind, grateful and forgiving.  It’s not always easy in a world where people seem to be increasingly self-absorbed.  So it means all of the little things, smiling, being grateful, it means holding doors even for that person who normally would be too far away.  It means being less concerned with getting places fast, letting that guy turn in front of you and sometimes two cars.  It also means doing your best not to engage people as they gripe, grouse, flip you off and turn into rage monkeys.  For a long time I’ve tried to de-escalate these folks by giving them the prayer hands to say I’m sorry.  And I try to blow kisses at the rage monkeys, especially when they are male, they don’t seem to know quite what to do with that, but it typically ends the encounter.

The world would be a better place if we all did this, consistently.  I’m even trying to garner support for the idea of making Mondays on Social Media a non-negativity day.  Try to get folks, just one day a week, to not post politics, disaster, dystopia or other negative topics.  One day a week to fill our feeds with positivity, humor and happiness, I’m going to call it Magnificent Mondays, I hope you will all consider doing the same, and push some more positivity, it will help you have happier days my friends. ~ Rev Kane

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Learning like a child

Learning like a child

Curiosity is the wick of the candle of learning. ~ William Arthur Ward

Originally posted November, 2018

I suddenly really have a lot of respect for three year-olds.  Because you see, in terms of learning Spanish right now, I’m basically a three year-old.  The parallels are frightening.  I can tell you in Spanish what I want to eat, I can point to what part of me hurts.  In context and when being able to generally anticipate what the conversation will be about, I’m right there with you.  But when the subject is unexpected, or you use a complicated term, I have a tendency to either stare blankly or smile and nod like a confused three-year old.

This means my life on the Spanish language spectrum is a bloody roller-coaster.  Yesterday in the mini-market by my house I held my own in a conversation with two Oaxacans.  I understood enough of what they said, to be able to understand and respond accordingly and felt really good.  Then this morning at the market, when I pulled out my phone I dropped my shopping list.  A really nice older man pointed at the ground and said something quickly.  I had no idea, at first I thought he was yelling at me perhaps for taking the picture I took, which made absolutely no sense, then I finally caught the Spanish word for paper and looked back to see my list on the ground.   Because the topic was wholly unexpected my brain just couldn’t keep up.

In one sense that seems terrible, but I’m so much better than I was a couple of weeks ago.  Language school here in Oaxaca has been incredibly helpful.  It’s been a really comfortable environment to learn in and I’m really glad I took this opportunity.  My interactions in the street at the market and in restaurants have really improved.  I feel far more confident and more willing to engage.

In many ways in learning Spanish I’m like an idiot savant.  On one had my pronunciation needs a lot of work, my vocabulary is pretty good but at times I’m really advanced.  I have the benefit of having previously studied both Italian and Portuguese.  My level of Portuguese was pretty high fifteen years ago and this has the effect of at times making me seem really advanced, and at other times getting me utterly confused between the two languages.

This situation is exactly what I wanted, I love learning and although at times it can be frustrating, it is a really positive change.  What travel and learning in general do for you is give you purpose, challenge you, get you out of your comfort zone and help you grow, all of these things together will make you happier.  I can’t wait for the day when I feel fairly comfortable in Spanish, it’s not here yet, but I’m on my way.  Have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

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Happiness Resources: What Does it Mean to be Happy

Happiness Resources: What Does it Mean to be Happy

happinessPeople take different roads seeking happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost. ~H. Jackson Browne

Originally published, July, 2018

Today a quick tour around the web looking for resources centered around the question, what does it mean to be happy. ~ Rev Kane

From Psychology Today, What Does it Mean to be Happy

9 Signs you are going to die happy

Being Happy Doesn’t Mean Everything is Perfect

What Does it mean to be Happy

What Does it Mean to be Happy Anyway?

 

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My COVID Times Diary – Do we get it now?

My COVID Times Diary – Do we get it now?acceptance quote

Originally published July 20, 2020

When the coronavirus first struck the United States earlier this year, there was a large amount of incredulity from the President on down to the people in the street.  I constantly heard how this is nothing more than the flu.  People debated about how few people had died.  I heard a lot about how shelter in place was a giant over reaction.  People felt very confident that the virus would disappear in the summer, you know, when it got it hot.

People have been, and amazingly still are, protesting mask wearing recommendations as an infringement of their personal freedom.  As if their ability to cover their face should be more important than keeping people alive.  People screamed loudly how this fake health crisis shouldn’t hurt the economy.

Well, let’s address reality at this point.  Here’s a couple of images from today’s Washington Post.

 

 

 

 

 

 

What these images show us are two very important things.  The first, at least 137,000 people have died in America from the coronavirus.  That number is certainly an underestimate, by comparison a really bad flu year would be 60,000 deaths.  The number above is from about five months.

The second thing the images show us are, is that at one point we had as many as 2,000 Americans a day dying from COVID. That number which had been significantly decreasing is now starting to trend upward again, we are quickly re-approaching 1,000 people dying a day.  And the number of cases is escalating at an alarming rate, and given the significant lag time between infection and death, it means that the graph of deaths above is likely to continue to climb again for some time.

All these fantasies we put forward in the early days including fully opening the country by Easter, then by Memorial Day all have faded away, as early openings, protests, Memorial Day and the Fourth of July gatherings and even “COVID” parties have led to skyrocketing infection rates.

One of the hardest lessons for people learn is a very simple one.  There are consequences to your actions.  In some countries the government and the citizenry took this virus seriously and life is returning to some semblance of normal.  Countries that acted quickly and stuck to the basic tenets of fighting pandemics have fared much better than the US.  There is nothing complicated about what you’re supposed to do.  You shelter in place and use that time to ramp up testing, quarantining and contact tracing resources.  Once you’ve accomplished that, you slowly and carefully begin to re-open.  You do this with heightened testing so that you catch hot spots quickly, then you quarantine folks who are sick or exposed.  Where infections stay low you can progress with opening, where they spike you shut back down.  It was well explained in a piece earlier this year called the hammer and the dance. You work this process until there is a viable vaccine developed and distributed.  Oh, and while all this is going on, you wear a damn mask, which has been shown to seriously slow the rate of infection.

wear a maskBut in the United States we didn’t do any of these things, we opened indoor restaurants and bars, we didn’t implement mask mandates and even where they exist there’s no real enforcement.  We’ve pushed for even looser restrictions, to open schools for face to face instruction.  We’ve joked that we’re culling the heard, laid off what happens to fate.  At least people do that until someone in their family gets sick.  Chuck Woolery, former Wheel of Fortune game show host, has been on Twitter for months, claiming that the virus is a hoax meant to hurt Donald Trump’s re-election chances.  He became quite the media darling for this, frequently being re-Tweeted by the president and other conservatives.  This week, Woolery’s son became ill with COVID-19, he simply Tweeted it’s here and it’s real, then deleted his Twitter account.

I tell this story to illustrate a simple point, it’s a virus, it doesn’t care about our politics, we are just a host to hit, a vector for it’s transmission.  If we don’t respect what it is, and what it can do, it will punish us, and it has.

This week, amongst rollbacks for restaurants and bars being open, with new mask mandates being put into effect in places where they were previously resisted, we see a sudden reckoning for our laid back attitude about this virus.  As people start to realize that secondary schools are likely not going to be opened this fall, as colleges go to online schedules for likely the entire 20-21 academic year, as college football continues to look like a smaller and smaller and maybe no season, as all of these things that we thought for sure would just be back to normal by this point aren’t.  We may finally be getting it?

So wear a mask, wash your hands, do the things you’re supposed to do.  And I won’t even suggest you do it for others.  Selfishly, do it for yourself, your family and the people you love.  Do it so that the mythical someday of normal life comes to pass sooner than later.  But realize, that time is not weeks away, it will need to be measured in months and likely years.  We had a chance for that not to be the case, but as a society we opted to be selfish, stubborn and ignore the science.  And this is the new reality we face. ~ Rev Kane

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Some of my favorite posts

Some of my favorite posts

being happy quoteOriginally posted on July 19, 2020

Tonight I’m being a bit lazy, I just haven’t been inspired much this week.  I’ve dealt with the some work frustration and an unfortunate bout of insomnia, as well as tweaking my knee on a run.  So I’ve spent this weekend taking it easy and trying to recharge a bit.  So for tonight I want to revisit some of my favorite posts.  Enjoy and have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev  Kane

Remember the Sweet Things – Maybe the best story you’ll ever listen to and a great reminder of the beauty inherent in life.

We all have to stop being afraid –  What does your fear limit you from achieving?

What is your most persistent illusion? – A question that we all need to ask, but is always something difficult to acknowledge and address.

Happiness is Not Safety – The beautiful outcomes  of taking risks.

Worry is the Enemy of Happiness – Why we need to worry less and how to do that.

On Hiking Alone – A meditation on the joys of hiking alone.

Appalachian Trail, Precious Moments – Some of my best moments on the Appalachian Trail

AT Happiness: Four Trolls on a Bridge – A short little story about a funny incident on the Appalachian Trail between a beautiful young women and four old hikers.

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Happiness is a few minutes of peace

Happiness is a few minutes of peace

happiness, peaceful

 

 

 

 

The greatest self is a peaceful smile, that always sees the world smiling back. ~ Bryant H. McGill

Originally posted June, 2018

So tonight friends a post inspired by a message I received on our Facebook page.  A group called A&S Elegance sent me a link to a lovely and really peaceful video with some of their original music in the background, a wonderful break, give it a look at listen.  Here are some other peaceful images and videos that you can use to take a little meditation or rest break, enjoy and have a happy day my friends ~ Rev Kane

happiness, peaceful

 

 

 

 

 

Wow, there are a lot of these sorts of things on YouTube so here’s a whole collection:

4 hours of peaceful music by Utopian Sounds

8 hours of peaceful nature sounds by Johnnie Lawson

happiness, peaceful

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A shorter 13 minute nature sound recording by Johnnie Lawson

A 15 minute piece of meditation music by Yellow Brick Cinema, I really like this one a lot.

Finally a quick 5 minute piece by Yoga Meditation Music

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Happiness & Expectations

Happiness & Expectations

ballon fix

And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. ~ Kahlil Gibran

Originally published November,  2019

I think it is a true thing that your happiness is primarily determined by one person, you.  At the end of it all, we determine how we perceive our world; we decide whether what just happened was good or bad, or how we will react to it.  It is our decision alone to determine whether or not we will face the day smiling, frowning, whether we’ll be present in the moment or float through the day worrying about other things.  However, not everyone, and to be honest I’m in this crowd, is to the point of self actualization in their life where the actions of other people don’t impact them.

We’ve talked before about taking responsibility, how to keep others from bringing you down.  The positive effects of smiling, focusing on the good things, and what being kind to others and forgiveness can do for us personally.  In all of our discussions we’ve talked about finding ways around others in order to retain or gain our own happiness.

Today I want to talk about a little different perspective on things; sure there will always be people we have to work around to be happy. However, sometimes we have to give people the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes we have to let people actually exceed our expectations. I know it’s not an easy thing, particularly when people have let you down many times before in your life. It is worth a try though because when it happens, when someone does something positive, something you were so sure they would not do, it’s a magnificent and wonderful feeling. Have a happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

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Walking Glasgow

Walking Glasgow

Originally posted May, 2019

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Spent all of today walking Glasgow while doing errands.  There was a dual purpose to my wanderings. First I had errands to run, I needed to pick up a few things for the trail. Second, I wanted to walk for at least 5 miles today, I’ll try to do 8 tomorrow as a warm up for starting the West Highland Way on Thursday.

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A mosaic at central station

I also needed to find the train station where I’ll be leaving from on Thursday morning.

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The streets were lively today and I saw someone taking the art of the one-man, pan flute band to new heights. Not just a pan flute rendition of Funky Town, not just the standard one man band, not just an ankle tambourine, not just a guitar, not just a prop Lama but all that plus three synchronized marionettes.

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Again the subtle differences slip in.

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Did you spot it?

First full day in the UK so fish and chips with mushy peas were an absolute must. I’m always amazed at how good the fish always is in the UK and Ireland.

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Saw some great architecture including this giant metal peacock, sorry it’s a bit hard to make out.

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And to be sure, there’s a little weird in Glasgow.

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One of the things that has made me happy has been the little punk edges in town. Seems punk is alive and kicking in Glasgow, lot’s of piercing, punk tees, doc martins and a little bit of attitude.

Off to Thai food, have a happy day my friends. – Rev Kane

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Finding Happiness in Patience & Subtlety

Finding Happiness in Patience & Subtlety

patience, happiness, subtlety

Chinese character for patience

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.  ~ Lao Tzu

Originally published February, 2019

Many years ago I started studying Tai Chi and Chi Qong with an instructor in Sacramento.  It was a stressful time in my life and I started doing Tai Chi as a way of forcing myself out of the office and as a method of relaxation.  I did well with learning the basic forms and movements of the style and the class did have the desired effect of helping me relax.  The side benefit of studying Tai Chi was the beginning of starting to look at things from an Eastern perspective.  There were two very important things that we addressed early on in our class, the first being pace.  We discussed the impatience of Western society and in particular the United States.  The first move we learned we practiced for two nights and the class was impatient, myself included, to move on to the next move.  Our instructor laughed at us, when he was studying in China they practiced this same first move for two months before moving on to the second.

The second topic we studied was the idea of cultivating subtle energies and recognizing the subtle in our lives.  This is another area in which our culture is very different from the East, our lives are not about the subtle in the United States.  For me in particular this topic hits home, I’m not subtle, I hit life straight on and I don’t do it quietly or subtly.  Maybe this is part of my heritage, my upbringing, hell maybe it’s genetic coming from Irish and Italian roots.  Either way, noticing and cultivating the subtle is something I personally work on.

Finding Subtlety

In our life here in America we do not live subtly.  Those of us in cities deal daily and constantly with a high level of noise and distraction, we move quickly from appointment to appointment, we eat fast food, we drive fast and we live fast.  A local news station is currently advertising by using a woman who talks about not having thirty minutes for the news which is why she loves that they give all of the important news and weather in the first eight minutes.  Really, we can’t spare thirty minutes a day to know what’s happening in the world?

Noticing and cultivating the subtle is not just simply about slowing down or smelling the roses it is about truly settling.  Settling means coming to a full stop, like a quiet and calm pool of water where the water is so calm that all particles are allowed to sink to the bottom leaving the water clear and still.  This is the meditation I practice at night, trying to bring peace and clarity to notice the subtle in my life.

We have talked a lot here at the Ministry of Happiness about the big things, the not so subtle things we can do to be happy.  Today I ask you to consider settling to find peace and clarity so that you can see clearly, notice the subtle beauty in your life and find happiness.  Have a great and happy day my friends. ~ Rev Kane

Other Happiness Posts for You to Enjoy!

Happy Anniversary – Ministry of Happiness: Our Best Posts

Fear is Killing Your Happiness

Remember the Sweet Things

Happiness is Taking Risks

 

 

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My COVID Times Diary – New World Road Trip

My COVID Times Diary – New World Road Trip

travel quote

Originally published July 24, 2020

So, after 11 weeks of insane levels of work and then a couple at the normal insanity levels, I finally was able to take my first vacation days since returning from Mardi Gras at the end of February.  I had originally planned a trip in March to Las Vegas, but as the coronavirus started to rage I cancelled the trip, which worked out as Vegas shut down on the week I would have been going.  Given our new reality flying to Vegas didn’t seem like a great idea.  I don’t like the idea of being on an aircraft particularly if they fill the middle seat, so I opted for a safer option, the good ole fashion road trip.

I decided to stay in Reno for a couple of days, including doing a day trip out to Virginia City to photograph the Silver Terrace Cemetery.  I had tentatively planned on stopping at a beach in Lake Tahoe on the way home but plans changed.  Finally I spent the last night in Sacramento and headed for home.

silver terrace cemetery

I decided to stay at the Silver Legacy, a place I’ve stayed many times before.  The check-in procedure on paper seemed a bit daunting, reading the sign upon arrival confirmed the process I was expecting:

check-in sign

The process was supposed to be that you need to wear a mask, pull it down and show ID to verify your identity and then have your temperature taken.  Once you’ve been verified you were to be given a wristband that verified you’d been through the checkpoint.  So I arrived and as I walked up the security guard stepped out and handed me a wrist band.  As I approached the desk I was still trying to put the wrist band on and the desk clerk says to me, “you don’t have to wear that.”  So much for the daunting check-in process.

Other than that little glitch the precautions that were required seemed to be being carried out.  No two machines next to each other were working:

casino renoThere were hand sanitizer stations everywhere:

covid hand sanitizerAny place that lines might occur there were the standard stand here stickers:

I definitely saw a little more frequent cleaning than normal, staff wiping down machines and railings.  Being just after the Fourth of July holiday things were pretty quiet.  But that also meant a lot of the restaurants weren’t open, there was no entertainment.  So for meals I did local takeout and that worked fine except when I walked out to a taqueria across the street from the casino.  On the way back I realized that they were controlling entry points as you could only re-enter through the valet or parking garage.  It meant a bit of a walk but controlling entry with temperature checks would definitely work, however, as related above, I didn’t see any temperature checks occurring.

Inside the casino people were the way people are, most were wearing masks, some of course not covering their nose making the masks completely ineffective.  There were also the people not wearing masks at all.  In the bar areas this was expected, but in other areas people were also at times not wearing masks.  All in all it felt generally safe, as safe as any indoor set up could be.  I felt generally ok and spent some time playing video poker, in fact ended up winning a couple of hundred dollars.  However, the game I most like participating in, craps was another reality.  On the craps table everyone was wearing masks, and they were standing with an empty tables spot between them.  I just didn’t feel comfortable knowing I’d likely be on a table in close proximity with 6-8 people for possibly an hour.  Even with masks, and perhaps I was being overly cautious, it seemed to be a bit too risky.

Staying in hotel rooms felt fairly safe.  Of course I brought a container of Clorox wipes with me.  I wiped down every surface that I thought I would touch in the room, and the remote twice!  In considering going to Vegas I had read some pieces on what they were doing in the hotels there.  There were signs in the room about cleaning, the remote encased in plastic, little gift bags with paper masks and hand sanitizer.  But Reno is the poor man’s version of Vegas, there was a piece of paper mentioning the cleaning and listing what was open, no freebies, not masks with marketing on them.  There is no daily maid service without a request.   The hotel in Roseville, was a little better set up at entrance, but the night clerk didn’t have a mask and was hanging out in the lobby with a friend also not wearing a mask.  The morning clerk at check-out was also not wearing mask, that was a bit disconcerting.

In general the whole adventure was fine but a bit nerve wracking.  I was happy to get away for a couple of days and even on the last night snagged a pizza at my favorite place in Roseville, Celestinos.  In fact, I had one of the best pies I’ve ever had there this trip.

pizza

Now of course the we play the waiting game, for the next ten to fourteen days every cough, any little headache, any moment of not feeling well and I’ll wonder.  But that’s the reality now in COVID times. ~ Michael Kane

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